Grid Effect

And she does, but the attack and the consequences from it only last for about two minutes until “the gang” (sans Frank) starts spiraling out of control to manage their health. This was, to say the least, a nice rebound from about three uneven episodes that had us wondering what the hell happened in the off-season.

First things first, everything that happened with Mac and Charlie at their office gig epitomized why we even watch this series. Put them in a real world scenario? Check. Have them approach the scenario like they are being unfairly persecuted? Check. Turn them into lunatics with the same objective but differing ideas as how to meet that objective? Check and mate, my friend. That was some grade-A hysteria, highlighted by the melody to Yello’s “Oh Yeah” and the subtle touches like Mac dismissively throwing envelopes all over the place. This bit will even make us go back on the theory that Rob McElhenney and Charlie Day do not work well together.

This? Is ridiculous, but we'd love to hear remixes to this song.

We were also surprised that we liked Charlie’s rant so much, particularly since we were so unamused by Artemis’ about three weeks ago. Probably for a couple reasons. One, Charlie Day is just a better actor than whatever that woman’s name is (which is why she shouldn’t have been the focal point of the climax); and two, the episode and this particular plot was just funnier. It didn’t try to intrigue me with something as absurd as “who keeps shitting all over the place?”, but it just put two of the characters in an untenable situation (for them), and they went berserk. Then Mac leveling us with the realization that all anyone was talking about was their mail really, really made this episode for us.

We like that whenever Dennis gets completely narcissistic and self-conscious about his appearance, it is either induced or entertained by Dee. It always seems to result in someone collapsing to the floor in a heaping mess. It was probably the weakest of the three plots (which we will concede is one too many) but it had its moments, not the least of which was Dennis’ insistence that the cycle coach (or whatever you call someone who runs those classes) invoke Steve Winwood into his classes.

Generally we never seen one character out on his own without some of the other characters putting him there. But Frank self-medicating (essentially) and giving DeVito a chance to relive his glory days as a cast member on One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest made even his storyline work. I don’t know, maybe we were easily amused last night, because that movie has been parodied 1,000 times over. We just can’t recall seeing one with an actual member from the cast in it.

A top-tier episode that managed to invoke several pop culture references, a Charlie Day in rare, rare form; a bickering Dennis & Dee and Frank losing his shit over free medication all a good episode make. We are barely halfway through the season, hopefully it is all up hill from here.

There were several things we liked about this episode, even if it did feel a little rushed considering 80% of it hinged on a 15 second scene after the credits last week; and obviously several we didn’t. But we essentially had three ongoing stories this episode to keep us interested, even if one of them felt as disjointed as anything we’ve watched recently. Namely, Jim and Pam’s dinner with his brothers.

It wasn’t that the segment of the episode was out of place or anything, but we didn’t understand why it was handled the way it was. Was it to show that Jim’s brother’s aren’t as good at pranks as he is? Because who gives a shit. Was it to establish how impenetrable their relationship is? Because we already got that. It just didn’t seem to serve a purpose, and the jokes his brothers were making were too Michael Scott-ish for us to actually laugh at them. Basically, this entire portion of the episode, while a novel idea, ended up falling flat.

So we kind of saw it coming, but it was handled reasonably even if the entire arc just felt a little cruel to Michael Scott. As far as plot is concerned it doesn’t really seem to fit anywhere in the larger narrative and we have no idea what Michael could possibly gain from this. We’ve stated several times that we watch this series primarily to laugh, and really couldn’t care one way or the other about the well being of any of these characters. But when they jam a relationship that is pre-destined to fail down our collective throats, I can’t help but find the whole thing a tad trite.

The scenes themselves were handled well, and seemed to have the right amount of humor interjected to levity the torturing of the series’ main character. But what was the point, exactly? We already know Michael Scott is a bumbling idiot who’ll ultimately be alone until the end of the series (if not past that point as well), was it necessary to go to such great lengths to illustrate that point more than they already have? At least it brought Amy Ryan into the fold for about six episodes, but looking at it subjectively it just felt like time filler.

If anything ever comes of any of this we’ll reconsider our position, right now I can’t think of a single reason the series would benefit in the long-term from crushing Michael like they just did.

The envy of the Ivy league.

Dwight still hasn’t seemed to “move on” from Angela, as Phyllis so wisely advised last week. Or rather, maybe he is just bitter towards Andy, because we didn’t even see him attempt to interact with Angela. But the switching of positions — Dwight playing the role of Jim (antagonist), Andy now Dwight — was a nice callback to when Jim assumed the personality of Dwight. Up to and including Andy running into the office the next day dressed in overalls with a cart full of beats.

But there rivalry, at least for me, has been a highlight of the series sense Ed Helms moved to Scranton. But we understand if others felt that the bit was lacking in plausible substance (why would Dwight believe Andy was conducting his interview?), it certainly wasn’t their best work. But we thought it was the lone source of levity since the Jim-Pam angle failed so spectacularly.

You know it’s a sub-par episode when the highlight of it last approximately 10 seconds, even if those ten seconds were the best thing we’ve seen in roughly eight hours of television this week. If you saw Dark Knight — And I am guessing you did — then you know how well the makeup was done on Creed’s joker costume, and that you will see a couple dozen of those this weekend and nary a one will come within a mile of being that identical. What was even more impressive, was how pitch perfect his “Lets put a smile on that Facccee” impersonation was, and how Oscar’s terrified reaction just enhanced the entire scene. Well done, makeup department and everyone else involved.

Back with It’s Always Sunny, Survivor recaps later.

So we hate to do these back to back, but this is something we could write before Survivor came on. Sorry but our vanity is just going to have to take precedent when we are posting for four times in one day from work. Besides, it is better to have this early in case you are a shut-in who actually watches network television on Friday nights.

NBC

8PM: Deal or No Deal

No one on the face of the earth is happier about this than Howie Mandel. The man went from being a hack comedian — who somehow built a reputation as being a charming hack — to landing a hosting gig for a prime time game show that requires an endless array and tolerance for dramatic mannerisms and voice inflections. Easy money, baby.

9PM: Crusoe

This series is actually getting some critical acclaim, which leads us to wonder why they put it on Friday nights. They seem to have a boner for their Knight Rider remake, which we are pretty sure is supposed to be ironically bad. But the core fan base doesn’t get the irony so their just watching a terrible TV series and taking it seriously. Anyhow, we would watch Crusoe if we had a masochistic need to write yet another post for Friday afternoons. Or, you know, had a thing for swashbuckling. But that’s not really our bag.

10PM: Lipstick Jungle

You know what’s hard in contemporary America? Being a rich, powerful corporate overlord with seemingly endless options in every facet of life. Oh, whoops. I meant being a rich, powerful female corporate overlord with seemingly endless opions in every facet of life. Man, its like, you know, like men are just intimidated by their success. Sure, millions of people are losing their savings and/or jobs; but try having two men chase after you in an obsessive but non-threatening manner all while they’re intimidated by you. Then you will know what real hardship is.

ABC

8PM: Wife Swap

One’s rich and one’s poor, one’s liberal and the other conservative, one’s lives in the city while the other in rural Oklahoma; when these two families cross paths, High jinks is sure to ensue. And hopefully in a bloody mess! That would be a ratings bonanza!

9PM: Supernanny

My God, how can anyone get away with putting this shit on the airwaves? This is infinitely worse than its lead in because at least adults can alter the course and tone of a given episode. This, however, is one woman going from house to house dealing with a different set of supposedly dysfunctional kids. Meaning the only thing that changes is the kids, whom are basically interchangeable. One snot nosed brat is the same as the next, that’s what I always say anyways. They do what their told if you have any will power at all; and the fact you let an ABC reality series into your house tells me you don’t. The parents in these would save more face if they just beat their progeny senseless.

10PM: 20/20

TV magazine journalism for the frighteningly domesticated. It’s probably about serial killers or something.

FOX

8PM: Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader?

Tonight they are bringing on a the Celtics cheerleading squad that the ownership brought in immediately after Red Auerbach died, presumably just to further humiliate whatever schlub they convinced it was a good idea to humiliate himself on national television. At some point, one would assume the masses would grow tired of such tripe, but the verdict is still out, and we might have OJ like deliberation to determine just how insipid the American public can be.

Yeah, this makes sense.

9PM: Don’t Forget The Lyrics

I am still mightily confused as to what this show entails. Is it a competition show like American Idol, that takes place over the course of a few months? Or is it more along something like The Price Is Right, in which you have daily prize winners, but in the form of a talent show? Or rather, a karoke battle. It doesn’t sound like much talent is involved, but we are happy to see that it keeps Wayne Brady gainfully employed. I get the impression he has Dave Chapelle to thank for that.

CBS

8PM: Ghost Whisperer

Amazingly, this series is still on the air. I don’t even know what else to say. How long can they expect to stay on the air if they put a washed up film star into a dramatic series on a Friday night? Apparently for eternity. We might see Jennifer Love Hewitt doing the same uncomfortable line readings until people forget that she was ever a budding film star.

9PM: NCIS

This preview looks conspicuously similar to the last time we ran one of these, doesn’t it? So, uh, NCIS, NCIS, what is there to say in respect to this series that is either funny or informative? Oh, there is a goth female character on this series that wears a spiked collar to her work, which is some sort of Government agency. It appears the federalies have lowered their standards or else they’re all sadists on this series, because that is fucking ridiculous. The only television series we’ve ever followed that dealt with cops and criminals was The Wire, can you imagine Ronnie Pearlman showing up at the court house wearing a spiked collar?

10PM: Numb3rs

Can someone explain to me the concept of the “3″ in the show title representing an “E”. It’s a backwards “E”, but isn’t that just the thing? It’s backwards? Why not make the “b” a “6″ or the “r” a “7″ or just put the whole title in brail and tell us to go fuck ourselves if we can’t read it? Whatever. The fact I’ve had to write about this series more than once makes me want to cut index fingers off and jam them into my ears. I’d be willing to bet that if you were to take the synopsis’ of this series, CSI, Eleventh Hour, NCIS, The Mentalist & The Unit and asked a fan to distinguish the plot of his/her favorite series from the rest, we are looking at about a 20% success rate.

Recaps later.

So here it is, about two hours before the prime time lineup kicks in for east coasters, your definitive Thursday night preview on October 30th, 2008. To say I’ve procrastinated is a disservice to procrastinators. Without further ado, here’s what’s available to you if you do not have cable and can’t watch It’s Always Sunny.

NBC

8PM: My Name Is Earl

Remember about two or three years ago when people gave a good fuck about this series? I never much cared for it, but it was unique and had a cult following. Nowadays, you ask someone if they watch “Earl”, they will look at you like you have a preying mantis resting atop your head, then you go, “My Name Is Earl”, only for the other person in furrow their brow, Then you add “…on NBC” to which you get, “Oh! On Thursdays, no, but I watch The Office and 30 Rock, have you seen those?” Needless to say, it has dropped a few notches in the zeitgeist, so says Alec Baldwin.

8:30PM: Kath & Kim

For whatever reason, this series was “anticipated”. I couldn’t begin to tell you why or what it’s about or even who’s in it, but it looks pretty standard and like it belongs on CBS. Nothing with a laugh track should be thrown into this lineup that is appreciated mostly by those who long for the days of Arrested Development.

9PM: The Office

The description leads me to believe it takes place primarily at Pam’s corporate branch, which is why those Time Warner descriptions are garbage and should be dismissed as such. Maybe 30% of the episode will be set there, which means this is the episode in which we will finally endure the dreaded “are Pam and Jim in trouble” subplot we’ve been dreading but waiting for. See, I’m already reading too much into it. Damn you, cable synopsis!

9:30PM: 30 Rock

I get that the series is funny, groundbreaking and a pop culture phenomenon, but do they ever have an episode without a dozen different cameos? And more importantly, is there anyone who will turn down the offer for a cameo? Oprah, Jennifer Aniston, Seinfeld, WIll Arnett…I’m pretty sure TIna Fey could get Bush and the Pope on here if she were a republican.

10PM: ER

It’s the final season! What contrived, melodramatic plotlines will they come up with to appease the redundant masses? Find out tonight and see if any actor has the chops to sustain a long-term career when the curtains close on this iconic series.

ABC

8PM: Ugly Betty

We’ve said plenty about this series over the past 18 months or so, so I would like to address the non-story of Lindsay Lohan being forced off the set of the series do to personal differences with American Ferrara. I know it’s her series at this point, but could anyone have predicted three years ago that American Ferrara would have the type of leverage to get Lindsay Lohan kicked out of anywhere, ever? No one should give a shit about this, but it’s like Zydrunas Illagauskas telling LeBron to get off his seat on the bench. The Queen has been dethroned by a character who wears braces.

9PM: Grey’s Anatomy

I saw on The Soup that in one of the episodes from the past season or whatever, Sandra Oh was impaled by a cartoonishly large ice sicle. Now, when we heard Katherine Hiegl complain about the writing for the series as a reason for not wanting to submit an Emmy reel, we thought it was a little too shrewd for a woman with kind of an entitled reputation in the first place. But then we saw this clip, and figured that while it might come off as ungrateful, spoiled and just flat out obnoxious, she probably has a point.

10PM: Life On Mars

ABC is really hitting on all cylinders these Thursdays, aren’t they? We believe we mentioned at some point in the past couple weeks, but this series is about a man who wakes up in 1973 and is convinced he is from 2008. Does he go to the doctor or anything of the sort? No, of course not. He man’s up and starts solving a murder. Because that’s what a man does. He can’t be troubled to seek “medical advice” when he is under the impression he is from thirty-five years in the future. Everyone knows that.

FOX

8-10PM: Kitchen Nightmares

Two hours of people fucking up meals, I can’t think of anything more riveting. There is nothing quite like watching someone fail at something you couldn’t do in the first place. Fail, FOX. Epic fail.

CBS

8pm: Survivor: Gabon

As far as we can tell, this is probably the dullest group of Survivor contestants we’ve seen on this series, set aside maybe China. Even the season Aras won had at least Terry’s dumb ass and the girl with the balloon sized tits making it to the final two. What does this season have to offer the layman, 18-34 year old straight male at this point? I am rooting for Ken, but that’s only because he is on a pathetic/insufferable tribe that also plays the role of underdog. I’m not exactly going to be devastated when he inevitably leaves. The only eye candy left is Corrine, and she is such a vile bitch that we couldn’t stand seeing her win a million dollars, which means she probably will.

9PM: CSI

The original. All you Miami fans who need the glitz and sex appeal with your contrived cinematography can eat a dick.

10PM: Eleventh Hour

Yet another series about the executive branch from Michael Bay’s pimp, Jerry Bruckheimer. It stars some older patriarch and some hot piece of ass that is smarter than everybody else in the world, and she is only taken seriously when she is wearing her glasses. Oh, and she can probably beat you senseless, because this person is so lifelike, see. Not like Kima Greggs, she couldn’t even put together an Ikea set. Man, what an idiot.

Lots and lots of shit tomorrow.

Hmm, that seemed pretty similar to we saw last week, just extrapolated. Instead of just over-sized guinea pigs, we also had over-sized “guinea rats”, “guinea mice”, “guinea T-Rex’s” etc. Instead of Randy running around the house with the camera annoying his wife, he was running around the entire city annoying everyone.

The only real difference between this episode and last were the five boys stumbling around Peru instead of laying to waste in an internment camp or playing Peruvian flute music. We still enjoyed Craig’s adamancy about how Stan, Kyle, Cartman and Kenny always find themselves in trouble, and how he served as sort of a mouthpiece for the audience, but it wasn’t laugh out loud funny like it was last week, mainly because they did the same thing last week.

I get the impression Numan loved shop class.

There were some memorable moments in it. Namely the camera panning out to show us Randy’s camera work, and him jamming his camera in everyone’s face, and the pan flute version of “Three Blind Mice” and Gary Newman’s “Cars” while Craig narrated his story. Beyond this, however, the entire episode fell flat. Site gags like the giant animals only work well when done spontaneously, and since we fully expected their return it felt overdone and desperate.

We really thought they could have done more with Craig. I thought they might bring his affinity for guinea pigs back into the fold or at least turn his kvetching about being in the Andes mountains into a full blown argument with Stan or Kyle in which one of them calls each other an asshole or something. But no, just mild-mannered, rational complaints and remorse for not trusting his better judgment. Again: funny, but they did the same thing seven days ago.

But, to each their own. Whenever I consider a South Park episode a letdown that tends to be when I get the most emails from all the fan boys informing me as to what an idiot I am. So if you enjoyed it, great. You’re watching good television and we just happened to disagree about this particular episode. At least we can probably agree that Chocolate News is a disgrace to sketch comedy. So please, spare me the vitriol.

Nothing much to say about this episode, back with a preview for tonight later.

Yes, that is the title of the episode they used when the Cuban Missile Crisis was in full blown effect. And yes, it kind of pinpoints why we were…not unimpressed, but sort of overwhelmed with how heavy-handed this episode seemed at times. That is something we never thought we would say about a Mad Men episode, but that was at least our interpretation.

We don’t want to dwell on this for too long because their was plenty to interpret and dissect from the finale, but having Betty turn out to be pregnant just struck us as a tad contrived. This is the second finale they’ve ended with a surprise pregnancy (albeit in a very different manner from last season) and we didn’t understand why they thought this was a necessary element to bring into the fold at such a late point in the season. Or why they will even need it in the third. I guess that is left to be determined and I can’t really comment on it, but them having another kid together just strikes me as a little too convenient for the plot. And a little too inconvenient for Betty. How many bad things can happen to one character in one season (see Gavin, Tommy for the litmus test)?

It just seems like the letter from Don, the affair with the random guy in the bar and a realization that the world might come to an end — so there is no chance for redemption beyond the life she already built for herself — was all more than enough to drive her back to Don with at least something of a clear conscious. Maybe we were supposed to believe that the unexpected pregnancy is the reason she went back to Don, as a result of a lack of options. But I don’t think I am buying that. She certainly seemed willing to head north to Albany if she feared social persecution like what’s her face across the street. And while I think Betty has obviously been concerned about everyone’s perception of her in the past, I felt like that was definitely put on the back-burner for the last five or six episodes.

So yeah, it just felt misplaced and unnecessary. They are trying to capture the times and I think one of the female characters contemplating an illegal abortion is a valid storyline. Just not with this character, and not at this point in the story is all.

Moving away from the negativity.

We absolutely approved of how they handled the merge with PP&L on all levels, from the switchboard to the Brits they were merging with. We have a lot of unanswered questions about Duck, though most seem to believe his eruption is meant to be viewed as a firing when they asked him to talk alone for a second. It was uncanny to see him go from triumph to exposed as seeking out a petty vendetta in a matter of seconds. Don will probably keep his job if he wants it, being the highest regarded talent. And Duck will probably still have his position as president, but with only a portion of the leverage he thought he would have.

That was some superb acting from Mark Moses, who played the role of an self-destructive drunk like he was a little too familiar with the experience. He wasn’t stumbling all over himself, failing to conceal his drunkenness as everyone laughed at him. Duck simply excels at his profession when he has had a couple, but is incapable of reigning it in when necessary. So when Don pointed out to him he didn’t have a contract (and destroying his ruse), he went from deflated to pissed off to regretful all in the blink of an eye.

If that was the last we will see of Duck, it is unfortunate because he brought a lot to the series in the way of a layered adversary. He wasn’t entirely despicable or admirable, but he was sympathetic and we understood his motivations. In more ways than one, he is a much more noble character than Don, he just has a penchant for alcohol that he apparently in incapable of controlling. Can’t really blame him for falling off the wagon, I would be in a wheelchair by now if I worked at a place like Sterling Cooper. And I’m 26.

You have to love Pete playing both sides of the fence giving Don a chance to prepare for the ambush and locking up the head of accounts job either way (Duck offered it to him and he is the de-facto choice if Duck is fired). Yet another tragic character slightly guised as an asshole is Pete. He has done some despicable things in the past (most notably whoring out his wife for a published short story), but is lacking any real tangible human qualities as a result of bizarre and privileged upbringing. Bud seems to be the only person who fully understands him, and that is a direct result of being in the same shoes.

But Pete has seemed out of sorts in respect to everything accept for work ever since his dad died in episode one, and only finally got his life together in the past couple of episodes. So when Peggy broke the news to him about his love child the timing couldn’t have been any worse. While Pete was starting to demonstrate a measure of emotional development Peggy pretty much telling him, “I didn’t tell you about your child because I wanted to do better than you” was a huge blow to his psyche. Especially after he just declared his love for her.

Weiner has made the point of saying that this season was about everyone’s inability to change. And what did Pete resort to after hearing this news? Right back to clutching that shotgun just like when he was at his most troubled in season one.

Peggy, on the other hand, seems to understand that despite Colin Hanks’ harsh device, some secrets are better left unsaid. Particularly when they are so damning and you have no intention of remedying the problem. If Pete ends up being her boss or having any supervision over her, we kind of worry about her stranglehold on that newly acquired office. Hanks referred to it as “unburdening” herself, she looked anything but unburdened lying in her bed clutching that rosary.

Do as I say, or you to will be condemned to an eternity of looking exactly like your parent.

One structural aspect of the series that I am glad wasn’t followed up on (at least not this soon in the aftermath) was Joan’s cockbag fiance raping her in Don’s office. Now that would have been extremely contrived, given how the majority of the country approached such matters in 1962. If Joan had gone off the rails screaming at him, as vindicating as that may have been for the audience, it wouldn’t have been an accurate depiction for so many similar instances. And the realism, the genuine social and internal conflict borne out of the given circumstances is why we watch series’ like this, The Sopranos and The Wire so enthusiastically. We wouldn’t write this blog without them.

And finally, Don Draper has returned (literally and figuratively) after three weeks on the coast first with the jet set nomads, then with his only real companion in this world in Anna; to fight his way back into Betty’s life. His timing was either incredibly good or bad, depending on what you think motivated Betty back into his arms. But this wasn’t the standard Don Draper we have come to see pre-Los Angeles. He was more subdued, and able to talk to Betty in a similar fashion to how he talked to Anna. This might end up being something he does every couple of seasons, because at the moment the change seems temporary to me.

(On a semi-related note, maybe it isn’t an existential crisis that makes him act the way he does, maybe its just the time change. I know I get fairly loopy when I head out west. Last time I touched down at 8am PST. played basketball in Venice until noon, slept for a half hour, ate, then started drinking at about 3pm. By five that same day I couldn’t recognize myself, either).

If this Don/Dick hybrid is here to stay, we do not know how long (if at all) he will be at Sterling Cooper. And what will happen with the office cast should he leave. If Don is too far gone from everyone in that office that we never he see him with outside (Pete, Ken, Bert, Joan, Harry, Sal, etc.) it will basically be split into two different series’. So obviously we are expecting him to be back and Duck to be out (since Mark Moses has been listed as a guest star all season). But I am not sure how we were supposed to interpret that from what we saw in the boardroom, as Don left voluntarily and Duck was asked to leave still under the impression he had the job as president.

Though I get the impression that sans the representatives from PP&L, all of them are just as uncertain as we are.

Other notes from “Meditations In An Emergency”:

-All of the scrambling seemed true to life. We actually worked for a company that had a similar merge (though on a much smaller scale), the panic and speculation were virtually identical as everyone found out about the merge through a different source.

-Betty’s doctor, while definitely opinionated, certainly didn’t seem to object to the concept of a woman having an abortion, but rather of just Betty getting one. Not being fully in the know of her circumstances one can’t really blame him, but still, a stark contrast to Peggy’s doctor in the pilot last season.

-Finally, we saw Don interacting with his kids beyond the standard usage for the plot. It was…odd. But given everything that was taking place, definitively understandable.

-Harry, we have a feeling, will be the most effected by this, whether it is positively (he excels at it and maintains the now empty “head of television” role) or negatively (is fired or demoted for incompetence). We have a feeling it will be the latter to keep the minions together.

-Neither of the Smith’s, nor Sal’s sexual identity crisis were brought back into the fold. We were surprised by this but are thankful Sal isn’t coming out of the closet in the same episode Betty announces she’s pregnant, the PP&L buys out SC and Peggy drops the hammer on Pete.

-We appreciate this series’ use of history and its accurateness. And though we thought the analogy here was easier than they usually go for, we definitely thought it was brought into the fray more so than other events they’ve delved into (plane crashes, dead starlets, etc), as the Cuban Missile Crisis effected everyone, and wasn’t just something that was discussed in the background of everyday life.

If we forgot anything (and we did this from memory, so there is a fair chance we forgot more than we intended) then please mention it in the comments and we will write another post dedicated to this finale. There is a lot more to say about everything that happened, as it was layered and for the most part nuanced and open to interpretation, which makes it all the more frustrating we have to wait another nine months until the series comes back, even if we don’t recognize it when it does.

We could have written the Mad Men recap yesterday and out of respect to you the reader and for our sanity, we probably should have. But this isn’t about what’s practical and what isn’t, it’s about doing the bare minimum and still being rewarded the same had we busted out ass. So today, later, we will get that done. For the time being let us enjoy some day old news items.

Oh, and fucking baseball waiting until mid-afternoon to announce that they were delaying the last three innings of game four until today really fucked us. We could have gotten the Tuesday preview out of the way yesterday and wrapped up all our nightly previews by next week. Sometimes, it just isn’t your seasonal shift.

So, remember when I said that Mathew Weiner would forever and always be associated with Mad Men, so long as it was on the air? Well, I’ve been usurped by Nikki Finke, who is reporting that Lions Gate wants to dump Weiner in favor of someone who won’t ask for $10 million a season. That is a heavy price tag for an independent production company, so I think their concerns are warranted. But we still maintain that this is a negotiation tactic. He demands too much, they put it in the media that he can be replaced before making a counter offer that they will then negotiate from. My guess is Weiner ends up with about $6 million for season three in a one year deal.

Speaking of Mad Men, here is a Simpsons parody which we all knew was coming. Thing is though, its not really a parody (unless the whole episode or at least part of it is modeled after the AMC series) of the show, just of the credits. And instead of a series of shadowy iconic images from the 60’s, it is a shadowy Homer plummeting from a building while brightly lit Simpsons characters and staples are attached to the buildings around him. Needless to say, they seem to be continuing to lose their touch. God, it pains me to badmouth The Simpsons.

It has not been a good six months for Ben Silverman. What with endless rumors that Jeff Zucker and the rest of NBC are looking to fire him, the constant allegations and suspicion about his supposedly depraved lifestyle, Silverman is probably regretting ever leaving his day job as a small TV production exec. Now Tina Fey finally admits what everyone was probably capable of figuring out, he is the inspiration for at least four different semi-bafoonish characters on 30 Rock, and since Tina Fey is basically the Barack Obama of comedy right now (you can’t criticize her, and even if you do, regardless of the legitimacy or severity criticism, nothing sticks). I get the impression that they were probably arguing behind the scenes, then the reviews/ratings came in for her series and it ended with Fey screaming, “I’m your boss, I’m your boss”, followed by her slamming her apartment door in his face.

If you do not get the above reference, hopefully you do now.

For those who may be interested, Barack Obama will be on The Daily Show tonight. I enjoy Jon Stewart’s nightly musings immensely and I will probably end up voting for tonight’s guest (if I do not abstain), but it has delved into a bit of a circle jerk lately and has been more of a daily prolonged endorsement for either why you should vote for Barack or not vote for McCain as opposed to an actual comedy show. Something we never thought we would be able to say.

It would seem that the ratings for True Blood, Life and Times of Tim and Little Britain are fairly underwhelming, because HBO is now entering the wine selling business. Specifically, Sopranos themed wine. If this feels like it is about four years too late to you or idiotic regardless of the poor timing, then rest assured you are not alone. Pssh, I’m holding out from HBO’s corporate shilling until they get into the smut business and open a gun store.

Mad Men recap later today.

Alright, we’re planning on writing the Mad Men recap either today or tomorrow in order to get it out of the way before Friday, and also because we might consider the finale…we don’t want to say “worst” episode of Mad Men we’ve seen, because that implies it was actually low-grade. It wasn’t. But it certainly lacked the same emotional and borderline spiritual punch that we are accustom to getting from the series.

Also, would the world series just fucking end? My God, if this becomes the first series to reach six games since 2003 because of God’s practical joke on the city of Philadelphia we might be postponing these nightly previews until next week. Which would mean our fall preview would come in November. Fuck you, baseball. And fuck you too, elections. Regardless of what happens with the series, we won’t get around to Tuesday’s preview until two weeks from today, which puts us at November 11th. That is roughly three weeks before a good chunk of television series’ go on hiatus.

I think it is safe to say, that this was poorly planned.

Onto the links.

Apparently the reason Coldplay performed three songs on Saturday’s Jon Hamm hosted SNL, wasn’t because Coldplay is a band full of self-important musicians or the writers and cast were feeling particularly lazy. Nope, its due solely to the fact that Amy Poehler is on maternity leave. Gee whiz, guys; it’s a good thing to see we’re not overreacting. Maybe Coldplay performed in place of excessive commercials (which SNL is famous for). You know, occasionally people in the public eye get too much credit for things they aren’t rightly responsible for, but typically not all that credit is unwarranted.

We will say this: Poehler does bring a lot to the table in current day SNL, but if Poehler really is adding an additional six minutes of sketches to SNL and they are completely incapable of replacing her, then maybe it is time to recalibrate what exactly they are trying to do with this show. When an average to slightly above average cast member in the history of its run is so vital to their capacity to just kill time, they might just want to cancel it altogether.

Sons of Anarchy, the FX biker gang series that we promised to watch but never did, has a fan base that  is reportedly 40% female.  The creator is attributing it to his work being “a family show at its core”. I prefer to take the Larry David approach here and say women love it because it is criminal, and women are attracted to criminals. Honestly, The Sopranos was a family show at its core, but I can guaran-fucking-tee you that about 90% of its audience watched the series to see who was the next to get “whacked”. Haha, its funny because that’s what mob guys say.

This? Is for the ladies. You can thank me later.

Speaking of Larry David, Curb Your Enthusiasm is slated for a return on an undisclosed date sometime next year. This will mark the seventh season of the now infamous HBO comedy, a season that we pleaded for an assumed we would get when David separated from his shrill, probably insufferable to live with wife. We hope he is coping with the divorce well, and that everything about it trickles down into the season with the Blacks.

And finally, if you missed this interview with Mathew Weiner and are confused about anything in the series, then I am willing to bet it will be illuminated for you somewhere in those 10,000+ words. I might just skip my recap in favor of copying and pasting whatever is in that Q&A. He also claims to aspire to be associated with Mad Men “forever”, which implies that someone, somewhere is/was assuming that he was just going to abandon a project that is not only one of the best ever made, but also his magnum opus. Would David Chase ever leave The Sopranos, or David Simon The Wire, just consider how ridiculous the notion is that Weiner would ever part ways with this series.

Potentially back with more links later.

Another Sunday, another home run from this young series. We really can’t think of anything other than Mad Men operating at the same level that never disappoints. And even Mad Men didn’t knock it out of the park last night (I know I’m in the minority on that, more on that later this week). I still have yet to feel like an episode of Life and TImes Of Tim failed to deliver.

At first we weren’t too enamored with “Tim, Stu & Marie”, though we love the opening dinner scene (”You ready to be stewed…My name is Stu, by the way), in between that and the video Marie made of the incident followed by Tim’s reaction to it, we weren’t getting many laughs out of the episode. But the outrage to the production quality really was the first thing we noticed as well, so maybe it was self-important of us to be so amused. But I can’t help it.

In “Miss February”, we got more Aimee than ever before and it wasn’t anything to scoff at like we expected it to be. Usually when they bring in a girlfriend on a series of this type, she doesn’t provide anything more than the proverbial wet blanket. Not to say Aimee isn’t a wet blanket. In fact, she might be the largest, wettest blanket we’ve ever seen in pop culture. At the same time, however, she has more than enough reason to be pissed off given Tim’s questionable judgement and passivity (as opposed to standard sitcoms in which the wife is just a pain in the ass for no reason), and she is actually given great lines as opposed to the standard judge jury and executioner role that the girlfriend/wife usually plays.

Dysfunction Personified.

In fact she has so much to be livid and disgruntled about that we wonder why she is actually dating him. But this is a situational comedy with absolutely no importance placed on character development, so we won’t dwell on it too much. Wondering why she is dating him is like wondering why Jesus has a talk show on South Park. This episode brought too many memorable scenes to contemplate the nature of Tim’s relationship with Aimee.

We absolutely loved when the bus boy intervening in the debate over what constitutes a restaurant versus a pizza joint. Between him running a mop over Aimee’s feet, the counter boy’s demanding to “make those fucking calzone’s already” and the frequency wih which Tim patronized the place, we probably didn’t stop laughing throughout the five minutes of the scene.

Which brings us to our only issue with the series, that everyone in the series sans the priest, the boss & Marie is so quiet and soft-spoken that when you laugh out loud at something, it is absolutely impossible to hear the exchange in its entirety. This is obviously an issue with other good comedies and always will be, but it is exceptional with this show because it is abnormally funny and comparatively quiet to everything else.

A minor nitpick, and not relally any fault of the series other than my gregarious enthusiasm for it. Again, tell your friends, your family, your dog, about this series and adamantly recommend they watch it. With the way It’s Always Sunny and Entourage is going, this series is handily the second best comedy after The Office. We’ve made clear our current infatuation with that series, but for pure comedy’s sake we actually get more laughs out of this than anything Michael Scott & Co. is currently producing.

Back with Links tomorrow.

So, just how drunk did Jamie Lynn-Sigler get last night when this episode aired? It is one thing to make a cameo, it is entirely different to make a cameo, have someone ridiculed over claiming to get a hand job from you throughout the episode as they throw your name around like you were a prostitute that said recipient of hand job merely couldn’t afford. Additionally, the series constantly referred to her as the character she is probably desperately trying to distance herself from.

Not the best day in the world for Sigler, but I am sure she read the script and everything else, approved of it, and these are the things you have to do to be taken seriously…I guess. If it is any consolation to her, Drama’s antagonizing of Turtle became old after about ten seconds. Just how big of a douche bag is Drama anyways? We couldn’t tell if he was jealous, in disbelief, or mocking him because he would engage in a sex act with Jamie Lynn-Sigler. At least someone casually intervened and Turtle seemed relatively pissed about Drama being the town crier.

If this is the type of role she is looking for, she should always be able to find work.

To the meat of the episode, which we were ultimately disappointed by. Having Ari take the position would have been ideal, as it would have sent a series that seems to be growing stale over the years in a new direction. But like we said last week, this series is inured to change. So it was no surprise that they had Ari pass on the job for virtually no reason at all (he didn’t want to “sell out”, which seems like something Ari has made a living off of).

We will give them credit for handling it well. If they weren’t going to have Ari take the studio gig, him using his leverage to bend Ellis towards Dana instead of Amanda was well executed, even if showing the phone call Dana made to Ari rendered the result entirely predictable. This series has always been escapism, and for the past six episodes or so Vince has struggled to find an acting gig he felt was suitable. Or rather, the only acting gig he seemed to deem worth his time. Because apparently there wasn’t another arthouse/studio Oscar nominee in all of Hollywood that he had any interest in. It was only a matter of time before everything fell according to plan, eight episodes into a season for them to have Vince’s future waning in the balance was longer than I expected, and we saw five solid episodes out of those eight. Kudos to the writers.

But as you can probably tell, we weren’t terribly impressed with this episode. To top if off, the homophobia seemed ratcheted up a little last night. Was it just me or was anyone else expecting a little outrage when Ari said about Lloyd’s sexuality that he “doesn’t fuck like normal people”? That, in addition to all of the plot
contrivances and Eric’s tiresome tough, under-sized Irishmen act, we were glad we watched this before Life and Times of Tim last night.

Recap for Life and Times coming later.

My apologies for this going up so close to the finale. We had people in town, work and a bevy of bullshit preventing us from being due diligent. Right now, however, we are sporting a hangover for the ages, are tired and pre-occupied with football, so we’re going to do this recap in bullet point/hyphen format, which is a shame because this is quite possibly the best work Mad Men has done.

-Basically Wiener has done with Draper what David Chase did with Tony Soprano but to a greater extent: He has turned him into two separate people. While Tony did unspeakably evil acts to probably hundreds of people, he justified it under the guise that everyone involved is aware of the stakes, it was for his family (more importantly Meadow and AJ), and as long as he kept them out of the business then he could clear his conscious long enough to actually function.

But Tony Soprano was always a prick. He had two different worlds that he protected equally, and while Don refuses to even acknowledge the existence of Dick (to the point it ended up killing his brother), Tony always knew what he was capable of and didn’t conceal one identity from the other, but almost flaunted the other one to each.

Dick will keep the memory of Draper alive and vice versa, but the only person who’ll ever be aware of each (at least with his approval) is Anna. Whereas everyone knows Tony is a mob boss and a family man, no one knows Don is Dick and Dick is Don.

-Don Draper seems to have been placed on the backburner and if we had to guess, he will be at least until season three. This new person, the actual Dick Whitman is sort of the antithesis to Draper: warm, open, understanding and most of all non-dominating. We were curious as to why they through in the scene with him inquiring the freelance mechanics, and thought that maybe it was used to setup some sort of plot change. Upon further review it dawned on me that those men were doing the same thing to the two cars that Don/Dick was attempting to do to himself: Mold together the best pieces from each entity to create one identifiable person.

Not only was Dick not Don, he wasn’t the Dick we’ve seen in the past either. This one was a little more confident, a little less shy and could still read a room. The Dick we’ve seen in the past (the brief scene at the car dealership earlier this season and his time in Korea in the penultimate episode of season one) was a nervous twit. This guy wasn’t quite as undermining as Don, but had gumption somwhere between the two.

Even with his “baptism” we suspect he’ll eventually be back in New York, and discovering what happened to Sterling Cooper will probably only make him regret his return. Does he enlighten Betty or anyone else to his actual past? Probably not. If he showed up at Sterling Cooper all smiles and gumdrops the earth would probably swallow the SC building whole. In fact, I’m not even sure Dick Whitman could do Don Draper’s job.

-We’ve never seen him so comfortable and at ease as he is with Anna. Given that it is the only person we know that is semi-aware of his past (she didn’t even know he had a brother) that definitely makes sense. He actually shows vulnerability with her and that was a little daunting but incredibly played by Hamm. Their dynamic isn’t even the least bit sexual, and I don’t think we’ve seen Draper maintain any lasting platonic relationships with women (unless you include professional relationships with Joan, Peggy, etc). Yet another trait of Dick’s that Don would benefit greatly from.

-Onto other, less pleasant matters in Joan, whose probably had the worst season for a television character that didn’t end up dead, is now being raped by the fiance she is pretending to want to marry. That helpless, stoic, hollow look she gave to the wall while he held her gaze away will be burned into our memory for a long, long time. We’re hoping she won’t go through with it, but Joan has always held a traditional outlook on the world and her entire life has been devoted to finding a doctor who’ll marry her. The whole ordeal is just devastating and was accentuated in her exchange with Peggy, whose chosen a career path and is flourishing. Joan wishes to switch places, but she won’t admit it to herself or anyone else.

-Speaking of Peggy, we loved the exchanges she had with Roger and Pete, the former of which barely even recognizes her and the latter being completely infatuated. She represents progress on this series while Freddy represented the old school. Much like the company itself, the old school is on its way out (as evidenced by Bert).

-We continue to make the claim that Vincent Kartheiser is the best actor on this series and every scene written for the character immediately enhances the series because we have no idea what he is going to say next, and Kartheiser handles the spontenaiety well. We actually liked the character when he told off his father in law, and get the impression that his marriage might be short-lived. You don’t just throw a women’s roast off the balcony and expect to get away with it. Hells bells, Trudy. Hells bells, I say! He seems to be the male Betty Draper, trapped in a role he doesn’t much want for his life.

-Tons of great lines this episode. As always most of them were from Roger (”I’m sorry, I don’t know which set of eyes to stare at”), but he was countered perfectly by Alice (seriously) Cooper, Bert’s most likely lesbian sister (”…Really?”).

-Why was Betty bleeding? Female…issues? Pregnancy? Cancer? Do some pregnant women and cancer victims bleed sporadically? How much more are they planning to fit into one hour tonight?

-Really, really loved the music playing when the credits dropped. It is called “Cup of Loneliness” by George Jones and was perfectly placed for this episode.

We might get answers to half of the unopen questions left at the end of tremendous season of televison. If we were to speculate, we expect Dick to finally reconcile with the kids he abandoned to some degree but we don’t want to get ahead of ourselves. Like Peggy said, anything he does he does for a reason, it just might not be the most noble one.

Enjoy the episode tonight, back with more tomorrow.

Well, it’s the beginning of an abruptly needed comeback, but not anywhere near what we need to get it back to third season/first four episodes of season four form. But we still aren’t completely on board with what is making it to screen, and unlike last week we can pinpoint several flaws that even the most layman of viewers can appreciate.

Everything with Sinbad and Rob Thomas didn’t work quite as they had hoped. Occasionally, well alright, quite frequently, this show spins out of control with the over-acting a la SNL. And there isn’t really any jokes but rather it just gives you the impression that it should be laughing because what is taking place in front of you is so off the wall strange.

This was hard to ignore in every scene with Sinbad/Rob Thomas. I can’t remember the last time I ever laughed at someone screaming “He/you’re my bitch!” at the top of their lungs, much less when they do so five times in as many minutes of screen time. Luckily it didn’t eat up much of the episode, but it was just really, really fucking dumb. So it has to be mentioned.

No windbreaker?

The high points came, as they so often do when they pair them together, with Charlie introducing Dee to his lifestyle. Coupled with all their interactions, Frank scampering inside the studio apartment and Dee’s adventure into the hallway, we got top notch Sunny. Between that and Mac mastermining the entire sell Dennis’ “memoirs” ploy, the episode was redeemable. As these specific moments were on par with some of the better stuff they’ve ever done.

To call this episode uneven is an insult to unevenness. Glenn Howerton was uncharacteristcally misused with such an odd turn. It felt like Sinbad and Rob Thomas were written into this to appease FX who is probably pressing for an influx of ratings. Basically, it’s what we were all worried about when they brought in DeVito. The difference being, DeVito actually blends into this mix, whether that is a compliment or an insult to the man is another post altogether.

Still, Kaitlin Olson and Charlie Day stole the episode, and as long as we get one plot line that isn’t completely disjointed we will always recommend this show. But they just feel so hastily thrown together. Blame the writers, the director (Fred Savage) or the actors, either way it feels like with the cult following they have it’s almost as if they’re mailing it in and hoping it delivers. Because right now, it is working about 50% of the time.

That was an improvement, because at least Fang managed to keep the immunity challenge close (until the last leg of it, at least) and they actually seemed to give a shit about who was sent home. Or rather, the camera let us see them giving a shit. Still though, we are looking at some dull episodes ahead unless the producers do something to shake things up a little, and it would be a little absurd if they did a second tribe switch seven episodes in. It would feel just too contrived.

To their credit and sort of against them, Fang wasn’t nearly as bad before the realignment as Probst would have led you to believe. But how could anyone have expected them to get this much worse? Everyone mentions Ulong as the litmus test for worst tribe ever, but that was the first season we watched. And we watched it post-merge so I have no frame of reference. But this is just pathetic.

Outside of Matty, Ace and Ken, everyone else seems like a liability in challenges. And Ken is a physical liability (as evidenced by the snake challenge) and Ace is a pompous dickhead (as evidenced by him sabotaging the pole assembly at IC). Crystal might be the most disappointing challenge contestant ever (she’s currently in a heated contest with James for that honor), Sugar and Kelly are/were utterly useless in everything we’ve seen so far and always end up setting their team back in one way or another.

So there you have it. Only one teammate in challenges who isn’t a detriment to their success. Everyone else except for Matty and we’ll say Ken — since any challenge he didn’t contribute in they were losing anyways — has lost them a challenge. It is impossible to win like that if they do not have someone like Marcus who can order everyone around without coming off as undermining or condescending.

As a result, if things keep at their current pace, we might be in for some more dull hours on Thursday nights. That is unless Sugar continues to toss her idol around to everyone who smiles at her and doesn’t think for herself. A lot of people seem confused by her logic with handing the idol over to Ace, and I think to understand it, you have to overlook about 1,000 things like only Sugar can.

She was under the impression that since everyone on the tribe knew she had the idol, then they wouldn’t vote for her out of fear that she would play it. This is hard evidence that she has never seen the series or so much as heard about it before, because for the past six seasons or so whoever has the immunity idol has to play it before the votes are read. And like we saw about five times last season, everyone on your own tribe wants to get the idol out of play so they attempt to blindside you.

In short, Sugar’s logic is completely inverted. The idol doesn’t turn you into some sort of intimidating force that all of your tribemates cower from in fear. But rather it paints a target on your back, and the sooner they find out you have the more likely you are to be voted out. Ever since they’ve implemented the “play before the votes are read” variable, the idol has been much more of a detriment than a commodity.

This is starting to look like the warm weather version of Alive.

It took Ken smacking some sense into her to get it back, after she either intentionally told him that she has it or let it slip. Frankly, we wouldn’t be surprised either way, as either way it looks dumb as hell. But this marks the first time that someone misused the idol so catastrophically that it actually worked to their advantage. Nice job, Sugar.

As for Kota, we are still sort of rooting for Randy on that tribe, but he is often times a disgusting pig. But he seems to be one of the few people who knows what he is doing and putting the pieces in place to accomplish his short and long term goals. And in a race for a million dollars, we respect that. Maybe we can find room to root for Marcus, Suzie, Charlie or Bob; but between the three of them they might collectively have about 20 minutes of screen time thus far, making it difficult to develop an opinion, positive or otherwise. On the other hand, we can’t think of a reason to root against any of them. So there is that.

Other notes from this episode:

-Matty’s little pact with Ace is clearly going to end up costing him, either a girlfriend or a better standing on this show. Personally whenever we hear someone gushing so publicly about a significant other from thousands of miles away, we assume that said significant other is cheating on them at that very moment. I don’t know what this says about us…let’s just move on.

-As much as we hammered away on Sugar earlier, we really think she might just be too nice for this game. When do you ever see someone cry over being unjustly rewarded? for any of her faults to this point, at least she is self-aware and has a conscious.

-Would anyone disagree that Fang wins that challenge if they have Jacquie instead of Kelly? It seems almost irrefutable.

-Do we have any challenge beasts this season a la Tom, Terry or Ozzy? At the moment it seems like Marcus and Matty might be vying for such status, but everything is so group oriented at the moment its a little hard to tell.

-We are in a bit of a conundrum. There are two people we are actively rooting for at the moment: Ken & Randy (Though if the anti-social behavior continues, we’re going to have to rethink that position). We want to see Fang win just to make the show a little more compelling, but should they do so, Randy has a 1 in 3 shot of being sent home. Between him, Dan and Suzie, he seems preferable amongst the majority alliance but stranger things have indeed happened.

-Oh, the person voted out. Right. Strategically for Ken, Matty, Ace & Sugar, this was the best move. She was combative, ornery deadweight, which is generally the worst kind. If anyone can think of a better reason to get rid of someone else, I am willing all ears. But Matty is a gamer, Ken is probably the smartest and one of the more athletic teammates they have (he set that course on fire last night), Crystal is great for challenges that require sheer force and Sugar is strangely one of the more tolerable people around camp. The only person you could make a case for in Crystal’s favor is Ace, and that is because he is arrogant and a pain in the ass. But his performance has rarely cost them challenges. They were probably losing that pole building leg of IC with or without him they’re so fucking dysfunctional. So no, Crystal, your logic is backwards.

A significant improvement over last week but that isn’t saying much. Kelly will prove to be the least memorable player to ever make it this “far”, neither team seems too altered by the events this week and we still have yet to see the new Kota face any sort of conflict this side of someone eating too much food on a tribe that has it to spare.

It’s Always Sunny recap later.

Disclaimer: This post contains speculation/spoilers for the series beyond just this episode. Read at your own peril.

Now that was a damn funny episode. This series (particularly this episode) has an uncanny knack for tying everything and everyone together, even when everyone isn’t on camera. There was a lot to enjoy here as they touched on or tackled virtually every ongoing storyline that anyone is interested in. Dwight could possibly be done with Angela (good), Jim is going to avoid being the obsessive and possessive boyfriend (though he probably has plenty to be paranoid about), and Michael has finally found someone who doesn’t only tolerate his clumsy crassness, but actually finds it endearing. So long as he doesn’t take it to new, unseen heights in the office.

The episode sort of did a dramatic shift from the first act to the second and third with the first focusing on Michael and Holly, while afterwards Phyllis and Dwight by way of Angela and Andy’s pending marriage. It is somewhat unsettling watching Dwight exhibit any emotion. Ever. But when he jumps right out of being vulnerable to attacking, ridiculing and berating Phyillis over her obesity its a little less daunting. So that we could handle, and seeing him cry again would have been a little too daunting. Coming through the gate and driving up the bid for the hug with Phyllis was a Dwight Schrute form of redemption that we can get behind: It didn’t cost him anything but she felt better as a result.

Was she in this episode and I just missed it? Did she write it?

Given that we know Ed Helms is leaving at some point for his spin-off, we are curious as to why they appear to be prolonging his presence on the show when they passed up an ample opportunity with Angela’s affair.  I understand why they were dating/married in the first place (Phyllis put it best, “Angela’s not much of a risk taker, and Andy’s not much of a risk”), but when his departure is inevitable we have to wonder what is going to happen between the two of them so his transition from one program to the other feels natural. We imagine Dwight says something publicly.

On the other end of the spectrum, Michael and Holly appear to be thriving. They seem to have taken a few liberties with her level of tolerance but if they are able to actually interject humor into their relationship then we’re willing to overlook this detail. But it seems they have put the pieces in place to begin getting Amy Ryan off the series with David Wallace catching the two of them making out and seeming less than pleased with the situation. What’s worse is that he probably wouldn’t take issue with it except for the fact that Jan was such a mess he will probably attribute at least a part of her instability to her relationship with Michael. She will be sorely missed.

Other notes from Crime Aid:

-That is the third time they had misdirected us with the possibility of Jim-Pam suffering from the long distance relationship. At this point I am fairly certain it will eventually become one, and hopefully they will handle such material with wit and originality. As I am sure they will.

-The return of Roy could have been much more dramatic than they made it, and Dave Denman did an excellent job of playing the will he/won’t he throw a punch at Jim, even while insisting he won’t. But still, even though Jim is nothing like Roy in the way he treats Pam (all these three letter names feel redundant), it’s good to hear he is at least somewhat cynical.

“It worked when Bob said I had to quit talking on the phone to my mom so much.”-Phyllis on why she believes in the power of ultimatums.

“Hell yeah.” -Holly, responding to Michael’s absurdly straight forward questioning.

“Boss scores the boss.” -Holly, giving Michael way too much credit on two separate issues.

“Either you leave that singing bafoon or say goodbye to this. (gestures towards genitals)” -Dwight’s ultimatum

“Yeah, that’s all inclusive.” -Creed, apparently enslaving himself.

I’ll tell you what she did wrong, she stuck her nose in my business and tried to help me.

“I thought you were her friend.” -Roy, in reference to his initial presumption of Jim when he was with Pam.

“…And one penny!” -Needs no explanation.

Quality episode with great plot advancement and a shit ton of memorable lines. The Office excels at leaving us on hiatus’ with cliffhangers that don’t feel cheap or manipulative, but rather natural and frustrating (in a good way). As we approach the standard December break, we are sensing the same professional and creative integrity this series is, at this point, infamous for.

Back with Survivor and It’s Always Sunny recaps.

You know how to tell when a parody of a movie is done effectively? When you haven’t even seen the movie but still instantaneously recognize it in the parody. I was wondering what the hell they were doing with Randy and the camera other than accentuating what a putz he has a proclivity for being, then when the CNN field reporter was swept off his feet it all came clear: They’re going to parody Cloverfield.

Now, I had a feeling that the “monster” in this case would be something absurd, especially after one of the random pan flute players referred to what they were preventing as “the furry death”, but when that over-sized guinea pig ran into Randy’s camera shot I’m not sure if I’ve ever laughed so hard at something so outlandish that I should have seen coming. It was either going to be a guinea pig or a care bear, and they’ve already had a terrorist murder a care bear on screen…so guinea pig it is.

Inflated killer Giraffe's would have been our preference.

Up until that point however, we weren’t getting much out of the episode. Really the only points we found amusing other than the parody were Craig constantly haranguing the four guys about why no one else in school hangs out with them and lamenting his lost birthday money (somehow his parents didn’t flip off Kyle’s), and the rogue Government agent calmly telling all of the pan flute band members that they were going to spend the rest of their lives at Gitmo. Save for those two instances, most of it wasn’t very substantiative.

But all the hysterics over an over-sized guinea pig made the episode. We’ve mentioned before that Randy is without question our favorite peripheral character on the show, and with quotes like “Get in your room, Sheelyy” and “Oh my God! What is that thing!”, for whatever reason, only solidified his stature. We’ve been hoping for years that they would do a Very Special Randy Episode, similar to the one they did for Butters, and this only typified why: He is too similar to the bumbling fucking idiots lacking any and all self-awareness that we seem to encounter too often for us to not find him comical. Your average Joe six-pack or whatever, if you will.

After three episodes this season we put this one in the middle of our rankings, as it had some actual callbacks to earlier episodes. Most notably that Cartman, Kyle, Stan and Kenny convinced Craig to fight Tweek after they claimed he was making fun of his guinea pig. That was a nice touch as I don’t think Craig has ever been so prominently featured in an episode since “Tweek Vs. Craig” in season three.

We don’t have much to say about it, since, again, it was lacking in substance. But there were a number of good laughs in this and that is all we ever ask out of a South Park episode.