Grid Effect

See, you take a week off from doing links, and there is some actual worthwhile shit to relay. I need to come up with more ideas for arbitrary lists so this isn’t such a rare occurrence.

Peter Tolan, co-creator and writer on the now scorned Rescue Me, is developing a new series with Mathew Perry. In which the Friends alum will utter the seaward, or the “C” word to you non-Arrested Development fans and those who follow and understand English. Apparently we’re supposed to care about the slur, but what’s more shocking to me is that Peter Tolan is developing something without Dennis Leary, and Mathew Perry is still able to find work. It appears being married to Courtney Cox, be it in real life or in fiction, is terrible for your career.

There is talk of a Weeds spinoff in the works with Conrad and presumably Heylia. Normally I would applaud such a decision being that these are/were two of the better actors/characters on the series. But the writers are overwhelmed as it is since they seem to be making it up as they go with the Botwins, so I don’t know if they can handle the workload of writing for two series. And a new writing staff generally doesn’t write for already developed characters all that well (see: Family Guy).

Speaking of which, despite it slagging in quality, Weeds’ fourth season premiere brought Showtime the biggest audience it has ever had. It seems like this is a common theme for series’ on premium networks. That theme being, whenever one of their series’ takes an abnormally long hiatus, the premiere for the following season brings in a huge number (see: Sopranos season four premiere).

Steve Carell promises to be on board with The Office for at least three more seasons. We’re probably at a point now where the series could survive without him, but I am still amazed at his loyalty. This is like if Clooney were still on ER. Also in the link he states that he is fully expecting Amy Ryan to return for the fifth season, which gives the series more star power than any series we can remember.

We think she’s on to his fake serial killer ruse.

Actually, that honor might go to Damages, who is sporting a cast made up of Glenn Close, Ted Danson & now William Hurt. At this point, this series could just as easily be confused with an 80’s movie. Throw in a Michael Douglas or Emilio Estevez for a strong lead and BOOM! That shit would be box office gold twenty-five years ago.

I hate to crush everyone’s hopes, but Lyndsay Lohan is waiting until 2009 to submit her work on Ugly Betty for Emmy consideration. I know, just when you think things are looking on the up and up for her, she’s going to have to miss out on the booze soaked awards show.

US Magazine did a countdown of top reality TV villains. Omarosa led the pack, followed by some guy named Spencer Pratt, Johnny Fairplay and Puck from Real World: San Fransisco rounded out the top four. Um, I remember Omarosa from the first season of Apprentice, and she was a little loopy and a bit accusatory, but beyond that she wasn’t terribly villainous, just comical. Puck, on the other hand, verbally berated a terminally ill AIDS victim pretty much until he was dead and buried. What did Omarosa or “Spencer”– if that is your real name — ever do to top that?

Jason Bateman is now under contract with FOX to create series for them. This is great and all, but isn’t FOX the same network that canceled the critically acclaimed series that he was the lead actor on? Doesn’t this seem like a conflict of interests? He claims to be an “avid consumer of television”. In non-Hollywood speak that generally means you’re a lazy ass, not someone who creates multiple series for a broadcast network. This might not end well.

Finally, given that we have watched Meet The Press every week for the past two or three years, we would be amiss if we didn’t say something about Tim Russert, whose objective and impartial analysis and questioning represented the last bastion of respectable journalism on television. We have no idea who NBC will choose to replace him with, but whoever it is, those shoes he left behind will prove to be too big to fill. His absence will be palpable for years to come.

Links or something similar tomorrow.

What makes a Thursday morning better than average? When you can return to writing the same tired useless bullshit that you always did, without feeling guilty because you never tried anything new. No, instead you get to feel guilty because you tried and it failed miserably. Your welcome, 451 press!

So here are some links to help tide you over while we wait patiently for Weeds to kick off its fourth season. But even then our expectations are nil after the most recent effort. We have some issues with that series that we’ll address in our season three recap that will be posted sometime late next week before the June 16th premiere. In the meantime, enjoy reading whatever I can trudge up here.

Alan Sepinwall, probably one of the better TV critics around, only had his blog for the last two seasons of The Wire, of which he wrote detailed recaps for every episode. So instead of letting all reasonable obligations end like that, he’s going back to the pilot episode, and writing a weekly recap for every episode in the first season. Not only that, but he’s doing two separate recaps for each episode, one for people who have seen the entire series, and one for people just tuning in. This is something we would contemplate doing if we had the time, patience, interest or resources to actually see it through.

Here are your top ten series’ with opening credit narrations. It’s tedious, pointless and ultimately kind of idiotic, but we read and enjoyed it anyways. Who doesn’t love a good list?

Mad Men will have moved forward past Don Draper sitting on his steps alone for Thanksgiving for the start of the second season. It didn’t end the first season with the characters in peril, and the season two premiere won’t pick up with them in the same exact scene. In other words, it isn’t Weeds. For which we can all be thankful.

The quintessential American romance.

Comparing and contrasting the strengths and weaknesses of the American and British versions of The Office. Seems like apples and oranges at this point. I mean, the American version has had four seasons, three of which are longer than the entire series of its British predecessor. Next week, I’m writing a post about the dichotomy between The Critic and South Park, mainly because they’re both animated.

Speaking of which, South Park will be available on HD for DirectTV subscribers. It’s a widely known fact that watching comedy in HD makes everything exponentially funnier. Its like being stoned, but on technological advancement.

Rescue Me “minisodes” will debut on June 24th, we might have mentioned that on this site. I know we mentioned the eventual existence of them, but no confident that we had a date. Either way, here it is. I, for one, am tickled to see what exactly a minisode is, other than a thematic commercial.

What a surprise, Mad Men and The Wire lead the way in nominations at the Critic’s Awards. Really, there is nothing comparable in quality, originality and style to these series’ on television. Lost can go fuck itself.

And finally, our other national nightmare might come to an end. Eventually. The Simpsons is guaranteed at least a total of twenty seasons, but for some reason it is speculated that after that 20th season, the series will come to an end. We’d be elated, but we’ll believe it when we see it. The show is an institution, but a crumbling one that needs to go away.

That’s it for today, expect a nightly preview tomorrow.

Well, that was fucking depressing. I suppose it’s fitting that Amy Ryan, whom everything we’ve seen her in has been utterly tragic, makes her debut (cameo?) on the best comedy series on television, and it turns into one of the more depressing season finale’s we’ve ever seen. Albeit not fourth season of The Wire depressing, but certainly not the quirky exuberance we are used to.

That’s not to say the show isn’t without its darker moments. But in this we had deceptive marriage acceptances, failed marriage proposals, affairs, and probably the nastiest thing anyone has ever done on the show in what Jan did/is doing to Michael. It’s amazing how they’ve managed to turn her from a sympathetic character into some sort of domineering, entitled lunatic. Still, at least they turned it into a legitimate conflict and further illustrated the depths of Michael’s desperation to have children.

It’s all the more egregious with the arrival or Holly, and Amy Ryan really adopted the role well. She just played the part of an exceedingly relatable character. We hope she comes back for the fifth season, but we have our reservations. She’s too marketable for film to get bogged down with a show that would eat up as much of her time as The Office would. The whole Michael conflict with the kid and figuring out how to approach Holly with Jim’s insistence to pace himself was the highlight of the evening.

Now this would be a decent pairing.

But it appears the story of the night was the non-proposal and proposal that took place. It’s certainly not beyond Andy’s cluelessness to propose to someone who is so indifferent to their relationship roughly two to three months into it, so we didn’t think that the action in and of itself was a plot contrivance. But if the writers tend to make this failure to propose an actual storyline and source of conflict with Jim and Pam, as much as we prefer them to not get married, we’d probably prefer it if they found another source of conflict for the two of them. Maybe something just a little less contrived.

There is always the chance they end up putting Jim in New York with Ryan’s job (I checked youtube to see if the video of him being “arrested” was actually posted, couldn’t find it if it was) to put the kaibosh on any of that speculation. Having him and Pam in New York would certainly change the dynamic of the show, but it would be favorable to her sleeping with some guy in New York because Jim didn’t propose to her during a mini-fireworks display.

All things considered it was handled well, but when the dominating storyline in a fucking comedy is whether or not someone is going to propose to his girlfriend, we can’t help but think the show is ignoring its main objective. We thought there was plenty to laugh about in this finale (not as good as “The Job” and not even close to “Casino Night”), it just expects us to be too invested in everyone’s relationship status. And I, for one, don’t want to see anything to catastrophic, but ultimately don’t care. I just want to see decent comedy born out of the situational circumstances.

The twist with Dwight we really didn’t see coming, and to be honest while we buy the fact that despite all her religious predilections, Angela would definitely have an affair, but she would never fuck in the office she works in. Or any office for that matter. It definitely leads us to a motive for Ed Helms to leave with his spinoff.

Choice quotes/moments:

“Hazing is a great way to let a new employee know that they’re not wanted here, and you hate them.” -Dwight

“You cheated on me, when I specifically asked you not too.” -Michael, upon finding out Jan’s pregnancy wasn’t his.

-Loved Dwight setting up Beadie (Holly) with the premise that Kevin was mentally retarded, even though we’ve seen it done a hundred times since the Seinfeld episode with Mel Torme. But Kevin has always spoke in the most simplistic, least abstract way possible so the confusion felt realistic.

“DOES ANYONE HAVE A CAMERA?!!” -Toby

-Loved that Phyllis was able to pull off a successful office party, even if it meant she would never be able to do it again.

“He has been cruising for a bruising for awhile. I am his cruiser, and my name is captain bruisin’.”-Michael on Toby’s interview.

-Speaking of which, Michael struggling to come up with questions on the fly leading to the paraphrasing all of his original questions: “Who do you think you are?”; “What gives you the right?” In addition to his gift for Toby, followed by Dwight’s brutally clueless honesty might have been the best two minute sequence ever on this show.

“What we refer to in the business as misleading the customers. Another good term is, fraud. I think the real crime in the whole thing…was the beard. ” -Oscar, though limited in camera time, especially this year, always gets the choice lines. This one about Ryan getting arrested.

Kevin: Cool, a bouncy house.
Phyllis: Kevin take your shoes off first.

“Mr. Andrew Bernard…It’s got a nice ring to it.” -Andy

“If there’s any details you want to fill me in on, like…what exactly lamaze is, I’d love to hear it” -Michael

“I need to go buckle him in” -Holly

A great episode, but as always, these overly dramatic ones (and we think Paul Lieberstein is a good writer) bring about a lot of trepidation about the direction the series is taking. Not to say there is a chance in hell we won’t watch next season, but we’re always on the verge of thinking it will lose its edge.

We’ll come out and say it right now. we’re not doing anything but watching basketball tonight. Not only do we have money on one of the games, and the other game involves the home-state team, we went to Cleveland on Saturday for game 3 of the Cavs-Pistons and walked around all day and night with a short-sleeve shirt on. It was probably fairly cold out when we left the game, I don’t know, I was too drunk to notice. But as a result my throat feels like the great wall of China is running through it right now. So, just expect more of the same tomorrow is all we’re saying.

I get the impression that all the news and press releases about the upcoming 90210 remake will turn out to be more entertaining than the show itself. The show was so over-the-top when it was on in the early 90’s, I’m not sure what else they can really accomplish in terms of outrageousness and still expect people to watch. Like I’ve said before, unless Michael caps someone in the knee with a shotgun for their family inheritance, our interest is non-existent.

The new cast of 90210, it looks about like one would expect.

Hi-yo! The Real World is making like the Nets and heading to Brooklyn. We’re not sure how people like the current cast will really fit in around our favorite NYC borough, but if they can supply the coke than I’m sure the twenty-something crowd will except them just fine.

I’m sorry, but we’ve often criticized Lost but always preambled that we can see the appeal. Well, if this actually happens, we take that all back, the show will be rendered appeal-less. If you are to lazy to click on the link like I would be, it’s an interview with “Popular Mechanics”, saying that the island everyone is allegedly lost on, is capable of time travel. We have no idea how close the series is to pulling this off, or if they’re just saying this for the benefit of “Popular Mechanics”, but essentially what it means is nothing is out of bounds for the show. They could learn to fly with palm tree leaves and it would seem feasible now. Christ all mighty. I’ve seen in commercials they all have guns now, can’t Daniels kill everyone on the island, regret it and then kill himself out of guilt in these final episodes?

Apparently I’m not the only one who was critical of last Thursday’s Office episode. This article claims it to be their worst effort in the four year run, and while we might not go that far, it is definitely closer to the bottom than the top of the list for us as well. It seems nit-picky, since the four preceding it were world-class, but it’s almost like they focused all their efforts on the finale and just used the penultimate episode to set it up.

It seems like I post a link to this after every Survivor season, but Sunday’s finale was the lowest rated finale for the series, breaking last season’s record low. Let’s put it this way, given how good this season was (even if it disappointed in the end), if it’s finale couldn’t beat out the finale from the dismally boring China season, then this is a trend we’re expecting to continue.

Finally, something of a high note, I guess, Mitchell Hurwitz has an animated series set to come out featuring the voices of Will Arnett and Jason Bateman. Will we watch? Obviously. But Hurwitz’s grand return to television, we were expecting something a little more enticing than an animated series. Essentially we were hoping for Arrested Development, but maybe with a different setting. Though that might be one liberty too many for them to take, that show was fucking perfect.

Sorry this is coming up so late. We had to wait until we got off work to write it so you can imagine my annoyance. I have a strict policy about not writing anything for this website on my own free time. And, well, when I have to do so during the 6:30 PTI (albeit with Bob Ryan, but PTI none the less) that just grates even more.

Anyhow, I suppose it’s a good sign when they take five episodes into the second half of a season after a writers strike for me to be indifferent about one of their installments, but I can’t help but feeling like there was a lot of missed potential here. I mean, a job fair and a golf course used as settings in one episode seems almost excessive for just one episode. But they felt it necessary to show the parallels between Michael and Jim and the diverging paths of Jim and Pam.

That kiss in the final scene (before the credits) really felt kind of hackneyed and (again) excessive for this show. One thing I’ve always loved about The Office is their ability (forgive me David Simon) to do more with less. Of course, what makes this show watchable even when were not particularly fond of the direction its taking, is that Michael manages to lean in and offer some commentary. But with little to no involvement in the actual office short of Dwight lacking any real authority and giving Angela the cold shoulder all day, I expect more than a couple physical comedy gags and some awkward confrontations. Something along the lines of Dwight in an NYC club is much more suitable.

Speaking of NYC, some partners in crime at corporate were conspicuously absent this episode.

Usually we pity Michael, but his shabby treatment of the aspiring paper company employee and Pam made us actually kind of hope something violent happens to him. This is generally an issue with this brand of humor, if it doesn’t work or is unoriginal, it comes across as more callous than pitiful. Really the only thing we liked about the entire job fair plot was Michael booting the basketball across the gym and Pam’s reminiscing about skipping gym class.

The golf outing went from a promising concept to something they had Jim take too seriously and turned Andy and Kevin into walking caricatures. I mean, I guess we want to see Jim and Pam happy and all, but I’m still only so invested in it. The whole, “he wants to impress her” storyline is only good for a couple lines listed below. Our ambivalence towards episodes like this probably derives from 1) we prefer comedies to be comedic, and 2) Jim’s attitude (or initial attitude) towards his job was so similar to ours. Watching him take selling paper even remotely seriously kind of ruins part of the show we actually love. I’m almost hoping they move off to Philly or NYC together, the two of them get their spinoff, we can ignore that show and watch an Office that revolves around Dwight and Andy.

Dwight and Angela’s non-developments were amusing, but never provided much more than them pacing around awkwardly and Dwight ignoring Angela, except for the occasional coworker interaction. It was in character for both of them, but just didn’t bring much to the table. You can actually probably say the same thing for everyone this episode except for Michael, whom when crossed a certain threshold, just seems like something from someone’s nightmare, rather than an actual human being (see Phyllis’ wedding).

We really have little else to say about the episode so here are the precious few choice moments:

“We’re to find some interns at the high school, need to euthanize this place.” -Michael

“I’m about to do something bold at this job that I’ve never done before…Try.” -Jim

Being back here brings back memories: Pretending to have PMS so i didn’t have to play volleyball, pretending to have PMS so I didn’t have to play basketball, those were the days.” -Pam

“The American workaday ends at 5pm.” -Dwight, instructing the employees.

“Justin is the ugly girl in the movie who takes her glasses off and is hot. And you discover she wasn’t ugly, she just had glasses on.” -Michael, describing the only student who exhibited any interest in working for them.

“I would never say this to her face, but she is extremely nice and a gifted artist.” -Michael describing Pam

Not their best, not their worst. We can live with one underwhelming episode for every four brilliant episodes. Even on the heels of this, we’re on pins and needles waiting for the hour long finale.We’ve had our issues with the hour long episodes in the past, but when done selectively and not compulsively, they’re generally the comedic and dramatic highlights of the season (see “Casino Night” and “Benihana Christmas”).

Yawwwwn. That pretty much sums up my general malaise over doing this post and the outlook on the day ahead. In hindsight, since we have yet to do one for Monday, we should have done a nightly preview yesterday and one extended links post today, but what’s done is done. So let’s summarize the interesting facets of the TV industry from the past 24 hours.

You know, I like The Office as much as anyone, but NBC really might want to consider developing some new series’ with staying power if they ever want to climb out of the cellar in ratings, where they have perpetually been for the past six or seven years. Replacing adopted series that weren’t drawing any ratings with sitcom reruns is no way to go through life, Ben Silverman.

Tristan Wilds, better known as Michael Lee, and even more so as the new Omar Little, has been cast to play an adopted son on the new 90210. This is great news that someone in Hollywood has been paying attention to The Wire, and might lead to the series’ increased popularization and more options for its cast (sans commercials and bit parts on various network crime dramas) even after its series finale. But still, the only way we’re tuning into this is if we catch wind that Michael Lee sticks-up Lucille Bluth for her jewels or something, and he does it with a shotgun, and immediately goes into hiding only to reemerge for revenge after Lucille’s husband has his boyfriend tortured and murdered. Essentially, I’m only watching this show if it’s like the first three seasons of The Wire set in Beverly Hills.

I have some bad news for everyone who doesn’t read this blog: Men In Trees has been canceled. We never knew what it was, where it was set, who was in it or why it existed, but it exists no more. We’re sorry for your loss Men In Trees fans, we hope this message finds you well, and that one of the other thirty-something melodrama’s on ABC appeases you before its untimely canceling.

Seth MacFarlane is reportedly set to sign a $100 million, five year contract with 20th Century Fox for his show of randomly assembled jokes also known as Family Guy. He also co-created American Dad, which is a slight improvement. But Family Guy was a comedy gem before it was canceled in its first go-around with FOX, when they came back it was with an entirely different set of writers and the jokes felt uninspired, over-indulgent and borderline predictable to us. Whatever, get your money Mr. MacFarlane, maybe when he is sleeping on a bed of money he’ll be able to conjure up something original and not targeted at twelve year-olds.

The lone highlight of a once great cartoon.

After his recent ratings increase and rash of good publicity for his stint at the White House Correspondents dinner, European publications are now endorsing Craig Ferguson as Letterman’s successor. I suppose they aren’t familiar with his pleas to have Jon Stewart replace the lauded late night host, but now that Mr. Ferguson is a realistic option we suspect he is going to retract his selfless endorsement. Or rather just ignore it, because we are probably one of nineteen people who actually remember that happening. In other news, here is him cutting short an interview with Bill Maher.

Maureen Ryan from the Chicago Tribune makes the case that The Hills is the new Friends. Not necessarily in terms of theme or plot, but in their portrayal of twenty-somethings. The unearned luxury that accompanied NBC’s last ratings monster is the same thing that MTV”s “reality” series thrives off of. Needless to say, it’s escapism thinly-veiled as drama. We wholeheartedly agree with all of this, and while we still have yet to watch a millisecond of The Hills, we find it disturbing that we can name three female and one male “personalities” (what the fuck are we supposed to call these people?).

Finally, Martin Freeman, who played the original Jim Halpert on Ricky Gervais’ Office views his stint on the international hit as both “a blessing and a curse”. Essentially it’s the Seinfeld hex for Europe and he blames that on his inability to find any new work. Umm, if he’s looking for commercial or mainstream gigs, most of those are over here in the states. The lack of work available to him might have something more to do with him being British than any noteworthy roles he’s played. Still, it must be a pain in the ass to be type-casted after a series which only ran for sixteen episodes, resulting in limited financial gain but possibly negates any potential future jobs. The Seinfeld people all complain about it, and they all made over a million an episode for the last two seasons (44 episodes).

Something different tomorrow.

Welcome back from what was a glorious weekend of actively avoiding television. And you know, if there are people watching what TV offers over the weekends I really hope they enjoy it, but while what we generally see during the week is bad enough, the weekend offerings are a constant barrage of idiocy. It’s like going from the rubik’s cube to the ball in a cup. Or rather, something less complicated than a rubik’s cube and more bland than ball in a cup.

So we’re back to the same old after a week long attempt at originality. Here are some links to start the late morning right.

Here’s some obscure website’s take on the top fifty television series’ of all time. It looks like they list them one by one, meaning you have to link to forty-nine different pages from the one you open on so we’re probably never going to read it. But it does have Quantum Leap listed at #50, so it’s probably a worthwhile read, unless it ignores The Wire, then the people at this online publication are idiots.

Jon Stewart will be on location for the D & R NC’s, if you’re into that sort of thing. It could get fairly contentious at both of them, amongst the democrats themselves Jon could end up collateral damage, and while all republicans generally tend to concede that they like his humor, they probably all secretly hate his guts, and could become the target of their scorn. Either way, things could turn out bad for the quick-witted political voice.

Jessica Walter, also known as Lucille Bluth, has been cast for the Beverly Hills: 90210 remake. She’ll probably play the exact same character she played on Arrested Development but will do so dramatically instead of comically. Which is why we watch AD and not 90210, because that character should never be taken seriously.

Tailor made for the primetime soap.

Amy Ryan is set to join the cast of The Office (Note: Avoid clicking on this link if you wish to avoid any and all spoilers, even for comedies). Either she has an extraordinary agent, an eye for good acting projects or just an incredible amount of luck, because between this, The Wire, Capote Gone Baby Gone & Before The Devil Knows You’re Dead she hasn’t had a misstep in about ten years. And perusing her IMDB page, it looks like the connection here is co-starring in Dan in Real Life with Steve Carell. We had to see that to restore some order in the world, because generally an academy award nominated actress doesn’t “downgrade” to sitcom acting.

And finally, if you’re anything like me then you’ve always wondered what Wire characters would look like in Simpsons animation, but never had the talent, connections or resources to actually see it come to fruition. Well, wait no more, because this website has taken the time to bring these legendary characters to life with a Matt Groening likeness. It’s embarrassing how much I enjoyed this.

Something tomorrow.

We’re not going to even get started on Survivor, but if Erik can keep up this current immunity streak, plus with the girls alliance crumbling as a result of his win and Amanda’s discovery, he could really make a run for this thing. Outside of Amanda I’m not sure who else would win a jury vote against him, possibly Cirie because she has been kind of lurking in the shadows dictating every move Parvati makes and catching none of the blame for it, but whoever she’s to go up against in the finale can shed some light on her misgivings. It was nice to see her blindsided for once though.

Anyhow, for the first time since the strike The Office neglected to hit a home run, it was still a double, but was so plot-oriented and at times flat out ignored the comedy angle that we can’t be completely adulated with an episode of television from a series best described as a comedic sitcom. Still, it set things up nicely for the finale and had some brilliant moments of tension and comedy.

First off, Dwight Schrute is back in original form for the first time since Angela dumped him for euthanizing her cat; and took out revenge on his arch-nemesis, Andy, by buying his car and selling it at a higher price after strong-arming Andy into a deal. The camera shot through the window after Andy sold the car while he was observing a sale sign that we assume is just leftover from beforehand, only for us to see when the camera slowly pans down and see that the sign says, “Contact DWIGHT SCHRUTE” was a highlight for me. I make no bones about Rainn Wilson playing my favorite character on this show, and from that camera shot to the confrontation between him and Andy to the outside shots of Dwight washing the car…the whole sequence is just validating.

Dwight’s ideal hierarchy.

Aside from that and Michael’s attempt to garner knowledge about gang conflict resolution from Darryl, everything was just tense. Even if it was funny it was comically tense. And we do not mind, but man, between this and the “Dinner Party” episode we’re starting to almost pity the characters, we’re not sure if that was intended for anyone other than Michael Scott.

Everything with Stanley just felt like it hinged on a false premise. Essentially, Michael isn’t supposed to be able to implore Stanley to assist them in writing a rapping voice message with the implication that he would be beneficial because he is black, which is what happened when Stanley lashed out at him. That in and of itself, along with all the other racist commentary and not-so-subtle references to minorities that Michael engages in would be enough to sue him and the company. We understand the environment that the two and everyone else in the office has come to accept, but that doesn’t make it any less unlawful.

The other subplot along with Dwight and Andy was Jim being put in professional jeopardy. That visit from Ryan is a pretty standard practice in an office environment. you bring in someone from corporate to offer a warning, then should the person in question finds himself in an insubordinate position whether it is his fault or someone else’s, that person can be terminated under the guise that “they were warned”. If these were normal circumstances,the tone of Ryan’s warning would mean that if he just upped his productivity all would be well. But his HR representative and his corporate overlord both have it out for him, and that cannot play in his favor. Unless Toby (surprised he didn’t actually head for Costa Rica) makes another untoward pass at Pam or David Wallace intervenes in the Ryan-Jim showdown, this might not turn out so well for our resident protagonist.

I’m kind of surprised by the reaction to Toby’s deceptiveness. He’s always been a sympathetic character considering he has no wife, no girlfriend, an estranged kid he seldom sees as it sounds like he got the screws put to him in a divorce, a job where everyone either hates or ignores him, the only person who doesn’t he has a hopeless crush on so he’s bending the rules slightly to pursue her. Not that this is the most constructive manner of doing so, but I’m certainly not surprised by his actions. He feels he has nothing to lose, and sadly enough, in many ways, he’s right.

Choice quotes:

“This car is a piece of junk. You have three options: you can either sell it for scrap metal, give it to someone you want to die in a car accident, or sell it to me. I’m going to use this vehicle as a carrier, it will be dragged by horses”. -Dwight, underplaying the value of Andy’s car to him.

“Seller beware, if you’ll excuse me, I have to get back to monitoring a three way bidding war for my Xterra”. -Dwight, indifferent to Andy’s protestations

“In the gang world, we use something called fluffy fingers. You tickle him, and he starts laughing, then soon enough he starts tickling you, and you’re laughing. And before you know it, ya’ll are eating dinner.” -Darryl, explaining the ills of gang life to Michael

Kevin: Every single one of my girlfriends has had glasses, it’s actually kind of a turn on for me.
Pam: I have to get back to work now.
Kevin: Can you just do me one favor? Can you say, “These are due back next Thursday”?

Michael: Were you in the Crips or Bloods?
Darryl: Both. And the Latin Kings, The Warriors and the Newsies.

Probably it for the day, enjoy the weekend.

Okay, we’ve managed to calm down since the Survivor write-up, but it’s all a facade, we’re still seething about that result. Anyhow, to the topic at hand, this Office episode had a lot of dark imagery and themes to it. Substance abuse, unrequited love, racial stereotypes…all extremely heavy topics for a twenty-two minute comedy. I mean, three or four years ago when The Office first aired, did anyone think we’d ever see Dwight in a New York City club making out with a center for a fictional collegiate basketball team?

After rewatching it during lunch, there are several absolutely hysterical points of comedy, but it felt disjointed more than usual because of all the numerous plot holes and it didn’t really advance any seasonal plot other than the obvious fact that Ryan is struggling with his new lifestyle. No, he’s not gay, just extremely troubled. And by troubled I mean reliant on drugs and alcohol to cope with his professional failures.

But outside of Ryan’s plight, we got nothing in the way of plot. But using a NYC night club as a setting for Michael, Dwight, a coked out Ryan and his dealer, well, that’s almost a sure thing for a sitcom, for Dwight in particular. And made us wonder all the more why despite how good Ed Helms is, Rainn Wilson’s name isn’t getting tossed around for a spin-off.

The rest of the cast locked in the office wasn’t doing much for us, but we thought it shed some light on a few things. Namely, the torch Toby has been carrying for Pam since the second season. Amazingly, the office seemed more shocked than the audience, because while they’ve hinted at it here and there, never did I think he would actually do anything so subtly aggressive out in the open. It struck us as more subconscious than a deliberative effort to be affectionate. Almost like he did it, then realized how he was doing it, then he was momentarily comfortable before realizing there was a swarm of people standing around him, then immediately made an excuse to run out of there in embarrassment. Really the only appropriate course of action for that situation.

But the entire Jim is the new Michael thing seems forced in a lot of ways. This is the second time they’ve done this, the first time in the “Survivor Man” episode it was much more subtle. This go around, we had Jim racially stereotyping people. In what other instance has he ever done that, and he has certainly had his opportunities. If they want to take the characters in that direction we in no way object, we actually prefer it given all the adulation people have for John Krasinski and his character Jim Halpert, but at the same time if it’s sloppily done like this appeared to be, then we need to reevaluate things.

There were plenty of things we enjoyed with that bit, even though We thought it shortsighted that they would even be locked in there in the first place or that they would struggle so mightily to find a way out, but we are able to overlook those minor details for a couple laughs. Still, this was definitely a side-story to Michael-Dwight-Ryan.

Choice moments/quotes:

-Quite possibly our favorite moment of the season, is the basketball team buying Dwight a drink, then him establishing eye contact before dumping it squarely in the trash out of paranoia that they were trying to drug him, followed by a contemptuous “nice try”.

Brilliant play, Mr. Schrute.

-”They look like white slaves” -Dwight, describing the girls in the first club they visited.

-Michael’s Wire tangent. Finally, that series is recognized by a broadcast network in some capacity. It’s a shame 95% of the audience has no idea what the hell he was talking about.

-”Do you live in a normal sized house?” -Dwight inquiring Ryan’s diminutive friend.

-Dwight singing his German lullaby as Ryan attempted to sleep. Reminded us when he was playing “Green Sleeves” on his flute for the employees offspring. Did we mention we really liked Rainn Wilson in this episode?

-Angela Kinsey who plays Angela, constantly behind a barrier to conceal her pregnancy. Well played by the stage crew.

-Everything Creed said during Ryan’s presentation.

Yeah, that is way too many highlights to not recommend or give Grid Effect stamp of approval. Only three more left this season, if they keep up at this rate The Office won’t really have any competition for best comedy.

First, a word or two about last night’s Survivor episode. We concede that Ozzy being out of the picture makes things infinitely more interesting and less predictable. But at the same time, we have no rooting interest at this point, and the fact that Parvati is the ringleader? What kind of dimwits are they casting out there? We are looking forward to the next few weeks, but not because we are going to be happy with anyone winning the million, but because it wouldn’t be completely insufferable if Amanda, Alexis or Erik won. And not necessarily because they deserve it, but because they seem to have some redeeming qualities. We suppose Cirie is the most deserving at this point, but manipulating idiots isn’t something we consider admirable, even if it is effective.

/off topic rant.

Anyway, wow, that was like second season Office with a tinge (or an avalanche) of morbidity to it. In other words, it’s the best episode they’ve done this season (pre and post strike) by a mile. Not to say the season has been an utter disappointment or anything, but rather this episode was that good, it had every little facet that generally makes The Office the best comedy on network television, and the execution was flawless.

It was a nice compliment to last week’s off-beat dinner party episode. As…interesting as we found that to be, we tend to prefer the Office episodes actually set in an office, mainly because that all but guarantees that the supporting cast gets ample screen time, and Andy and Kevin knocked it out of the park. Apparently there is discussion of giving Ed Helms a spin off with Andy, and while we would definitely tune in, as little as two days ago we weren’t sure he could carry a show by his lonesome. Last night’s episode instilled a little confidence in us.

There impassioned mission to get their old parking spots back is the sort of plot that turned us onto the series in the first place. A somewhat trivial dilemma ends up consuming one or two of these characters because these desk humping jobs are soul-sucking cubicles of despair that can make anything seem significant. I mean, if you’re Kevin or Andy, what would you rather be doing with your time, sweating customers and balanced checking accounts or shortening your on-foot commute from the parking lot to the office? Not that we speak from experience or anything.

It even showed us a human side of Kevin, something I’m not sure he’s ever been afforded. Those are the type of dramatic moments I appreciate out of this show, ones that are born out of comedy. It was almost heartbreaking to see him so validated by such a small victory.

Heavy lies the crown.

Speaking of which, most guys I know who watched this episode scoffed at the Jim-Pam fake proposal that all but closed the episode. We found it hilarious, however, as they were mocking the very notion that the two would rush into an engagement, and we’d be willing to bet that 90% of the shippers out there fell for it harder than Pam did. I think it’s all but been established that their relationship won’t ruin the show, since it in and of itself is quite comedic at times, so as long as they can keep the budding relationship funny at least 70% of the time, we don’t have to worry about The Office being “Ross and Rachel”-ized.

The main plot almost took a backseat to the two subplots, in part because we never recall Michael Scott’s dating life being such a force on this series. Though we can agree that the chair model was indeed something to aspire for. From that, the blind date made us uncomfortable, not to the same degree that last week made us squirm, but it really accentuated Michael’s sense of entitlement and laid the groundwork for Michael dating someone he would usually find unacceptable. We might see Pam’s landlady again before the season is over.

Choice quotes:

“I can’t think of anyone I hate enough to write their name down on this card” -Stanley, when Michael ordered his employees to offer up a woman they could each set him up with.

“Andrew Bernard is…the name of me” -Andy, introducing himself to the five fathers.

“Pam? Will you…wait for me, while I tie my shoe” -Jim

“I set Michael up with my landlady because she’s really sweet and sh-, whatever, I just can’t stand Michael like this.” -Pam

Andy: We won’t disappoint you.
Michael: You can’t disappoint me. That’s impossible because I don’t really care.
-Michael dismissing Andy and Kevin’s pleas to do something about the parking.

“One to go.” -Creed, compiling office chairs.

“You are to find me a date, use this, as your template.” -Michael pointing the chair model to everyone’s attention.

-The entire awkward exchange between Phyllis and Michael regarding her unseen friend.

-Kevin’s exposition of the five families.

“What’s her name? Burger King?” -Michael, after one of his employees anonymously gave him the number to a Wendy’s.

Turned out this was a BJ Novak written episode, and he has really perfected his craft over the seasons. We’re definitely giving this top ten episode status, if not top five. We still are partial to the “Pretzel Day” episode, “Casino Night”, and several others we can’t recall immediately. But yes, it’s episodes like this that make us pine for a weekly half hour extension.

Ahh, it’s good to be back. Or rather, it’s good to have a second comedy we watch back on television. After watching some reruns on TBS, we realize we might have taken this show for granted before the strike. It was getting to the point where we were almost dreading Thursday at 8:30 or 9pm to roll around. But as the strike continued and we were left with fewer and fewer comedy series’, the absence that seemed the most noticeable was The Office’s. In other words, we were really looking forward to last night’s half season premiere.

And then….Well, then we remembered why watching three and a half seasons of this my grow wearisome: At times it makes us extremely uncomfortable. Obviously not in any real tangible way, bu when you are watching people, even characters on a television show embarrass themselves for twenty-two minutes, regardless of how funny it may be, it can take it’s toll on you after three or four years.

This isn’t to say that last night’s episode was a complete letdown. Have of the humor is in the awkwardness. But “Dinner Party” was exceptionally cringe-inducing. Between the little couch, the multiple vasectomies, the horrifying love ballad by Hunter, the Pam-Jan confrontations and everything else in between, we felt like we should have gotten up and left to save us any further embarrassment. Except we were being subjected to this through a little box in our living room, not at an overpriced condominium in Scranton, Pennsylvania.

If given the choice of being locked into a room with Bigfoot, Jan or the Loch Ness monster, we’d need ample time to weigh our options.

We’re not sure if that makes this good or bad comedy, but for as much as we were squirming it was definitely effective. One thing we will say is it did seem a bit prolonged, like maybe they could have had a subplot with Dwight and Mose (though it was great situational relief when he showed up with his old babysitter, reminded me of Buster and Lucille Osterro) or some of the supporting cast to provide a little levity. It probably wasn’t necessary to have as many scenes as they did with Jan humiliating Michael and vice-versa. Though the level of dysfunction was captured perfectly, it just seemed redundant and predictable, because we all knew there would be some sort of boiling point for the two of them.

The obvious and probably appropriate comparison seems to be too Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?. But in a way, and probably because it’s more recent, it reminded us of The Sopranos second half of season six premiere at Jan and Bobby’s lake house. Both were premieres in the middle of a season, both were “couples only” gatherings and both revolved around dinner, drinking and games. The only real differences were the number of couples and Jim never ended up kicking the shit out of Michael. But that doesn’t mean he didn’t want to. Certainly there lies a seething disdain underneath all the ubiquitous horrified looks at the camera.

Some highlights:

“It has an oaky afterbirth” -Michael

“I’m beginning to think there wasn’t any work emergency.” -Jim, after realizing Michael had duped him into attending dinner at his condo.

“Snip, snap; snip, snap; snip, snap! Do you have any idea the toll, three vasectomies takes on your body!” -Michael

“I can just stand here and watch television for hours” -Michael, referencing his mini-plasma

“Our relationship is purely carnal.” -Dwight, referencing his dinner date/former babysitter

-Andy snagging a bite off of Angela’s ice cream, and her pounding what’s left of it into the side of his car.

It’s good to have it back, though we were expecting something a little….lighter, to be honest. But at this point we’ll take what we can get.

Some links or something later.

We decide to partake in a week long tribute to the greatest drama of all time after weeks of monotony in the television industry, and sure enough, news breaks on several fronts that interest us. We’ll be discussing The Wire all day tomorrow and next week, but today we’ll post some links and our Survivor recap later today.

First and foremost, It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia is returning for a fourth season. We;re not exactly certain what the delay was, every one we know watches and enjoys it, and that is reflected by the stellar 9.6/10 ranking it has on IMDB. Yes, IMDB people tend to consist largely of teenagers with skateboards and dimebags on their person in school, but it indicates a larger audience than FX could ever expect for such an abnormal sitcom.

I can’t believe this was announced in the same week, much less the same day as It’s Always Sunny’s return, or really I can’t believed this was announced at all: Friday Night Lights is set to be renewed for a third season. How, you ask? Direct TV is going to share production costs with NBC and air the series on one of their selected channels. So not only does the series get picked up, it gets a larger platform. The city of Seattle probably wishes they could be so fortunate with the Sonics.

There back this summer, long underwear and all.

So that’s encouraging for two of the series’ we regularly review here, could anything beneficial happen to another, making this an extraordinarily good week for television even if it’s a bad week for everything else? Well, looky here: The Office cast is returning to work today. Holy shit, my head’s spinning with good news this morning. Seriously, I’m like Lucille Osterro right now.

Not exactly news, but we loved this feature on one of the blogs we regularly visit. Three critics each picked a show and argued for that series’ status as the greatest television drama of all time. The three shows in question: The Sopranos, The Wire and Deadwood. If forced to choose, and mind you each series has it’s own characteristics that make it better than the other two, we rank them as such: The Wire stay the king, The Sopranos, Deadwood.

If you’ve ever read this blog you could probably guess that, and its not that we dislike Deadwood but after a season and a half of it we bowed out because it struck us as somewhat one-dimensional. The former two series’ have plenty in common but approach them from different angles, we gave the nod to The Wire because it has a wider range of characters, more of an emotional core, and it emphasizes the political, rather than the personal, which The Sopranos does in spades ever so eloquently.

Speculation on whether or not SNL sparked this Clinton surge is rampant. If it’s true, and it certainly looks like it could be, it would represent a new low in American politics. First off, SNL isn’t even remotely funny anymore. They might as well have us watch the last five minutes of Million Dollar Baby on a continuous loop for ninety minutes, because that would be equally hilarious. Second of all, if sketch comedy shows are determining election outcomes then we really need to collectively reevaluate how are leaders come to fruition, because this is getting absurd. Though to be fair, any of those politically oriented sketches were ten times more persuasive than that bullshit ad with the ringing phone.

We’ve actually known about this for some time, as we saw the movie 25th Hour the week it came out. But Isiah Whitlock, better known as Clay Davis, first used his catchphrase, “Shhhhheeeeiiiit” in the Spike Lee film, not The Wire. Does it kill its efficacy? Not really because it seems so appropriate for the character, it’s just another example of institutional bureaucracy.

Finally, a British man has opened the “Tony Soprano Pizza Shop” somewhere in North Hampton. It immediately becomes the best restaurant in its area, not because of its name, but rather because it serves something edible. This might be better than the local McDonalds.

Back with the Survivor recap later today.

Well, we sort of lied at the end of last Friday’s post. But we were riding the crest of a high and beautiful wave, and at that moment in time, we felt like we were being honest. As it turned out though, work began to increase rapidly and we completely forgot about any sort of promise we may have made.

No worries, however, because from the looks of things, nothing much has happened in between Thursday and today to really warrant a full blown links post for both days. But, we’ll make do with the hand the television industry hath dealt us.

Sad news for anyone who’s a fan of loose morality and exploitation, Kid Nation is set to be taken off the air. And for once, we approve of a decision made by CBS and their entertainment department.

Jessica Simpson (see, I told you we had limited news options) is considering a return to reality television. Is she nuts? Reality television is no place for attractive, talentless, idiot, hack blonds who anger Dallas Cowboy fans beyond all reason. Well, actually, reality television is the place for all of that, but we already have a surplus on her demographic, so maybe she’ll be shunned? Eh, who the fuck am I kidding?

If she isn’t a reality star, then I don’t know who is.

Tim Goodman wants to know why the average television viewer isn’t as bitter and contemptuous as your average critic. While we can’t say for certain, we imagine the indifference is a result of poor quality. Christ, only two series’ we watch were even affected by the strike (The Office which returns in April, and FNL which might actually be a casualty of the lockout), and we write a freaking TV blog. Point being, while many people watch Heroes, they might not be overly devoted to it because it isn’t really all that good. And while they might enjoy tuning in for an hour every week, its absence doesn’t create and irreplaceable void or anything.

If you thought last night’s Wire episode had a different ebb and flow to it, then a possible explanation might be it was the directorial debut for Dominic West (McNutty). While we agree with this sentiment, we certainly aren’t opposed to it. For a season so wildly paced and eccentric compared to its earlier parts, we think a different directorial style is appropriate.

Finally, Office writers fell back into old habits by reconvening at a restaurant to discuss possible script ideas. The pressure is probably immense to return with something side-splittingly funny. Glad it’s not me.

This was weak, back with something exceptionally longer tomorrow.

It looks like we’ll have more material within a couple months. Why is that, you ask? Well, because the strike has, for all intensive purposes come to an end. Depending on which side you listen to, the other side won (not terribly surprising that everyone in Hollywood opts to play the victim card). But still, they can at least move on from all this hullabaloo and get back to entertaining us. In two months time we should be having weekly recaps of The Office, and, ummm, huh; well, maybe additional Friday Night Lights episodes. Well, that’s on top of South Park, which should be returning sooner rather than later.

So for the foreseeable future on Grid Effect, we’ll be recapping Survivor and The Wire. At some point in the next couple months South Park will be added to the docket, followed by The Office and potentially (though unlikely) FNL will be recapped as well. That’s five shows, about the best we ever do on this website.

If you’re a fan of the outrageous as opposed to the realistic, then I have some bad news for you, my friend. It appears Heroes and 24 are both done for this television season. That means no detonating nuclear missiles and no cheerleader that always wears her competitive outfit, even while saving the planet. If these things appeal to you, then 2009 will look much brighter than 2008. Also, if you’re looking for an upcoming schedule of which series’ will return to the airwaves when, then look no further.

The strike cost tinseltown an estimated $2 billion dollars. $2 billion. What is the country spending on the war per month? Doesn’t this have to ballpark it? $2 billion for roughly three months is $666,666,666 per month. Clearly I need to be making friends with these people as opposed to mocking them and their sometimes lazy, pedestrian work.

According to a recent survey — which are never inaccurate, much like exit polls — half of all British men would sacrifice six months for a new plasma. First off, six months is nothing. In the immortal words of George Costanza, “I could do six months on my head”. Secondly, suppose we lived in Britain, if we were to give up sex for six months for anything, it would probably be a pizza, or a cheeseburger, or something remotely edible. Not like the awfulness that is mainstream over there. And thirdly, if we’re giving up sex with just Great Britain residents, it’s not something we’d consider a huge loss. So we’d probably be willing to sacrifice sex in Great Britain for six months for a pack of mentos and a new basketball….But that’s just us.

To be fair, we value a pack of these like most people value their offspring.

For whatever reason, Craig Ferguson is voluntarily suggesting that should Letterman leave his post, that Jon Stewart should be named his successor, and not him. I mean, he’s right, but that’s not entirely the point. Has anyone ever voluntarily given up his opportunity to move up a time slot in the late night game? Christ, even Carson Daly is contending to fill Conan O’Brien’s shoes. And as little as we think of Craig Ferguson, Daly makes him look like Carson. In a way I admire this. He’s content with his position (which is a comfortable one) and doesn’t have an over-sized ego that needs validation, but it’s just so atypical.

FNL wasn’t intended to be a cliffhanger on Friday, which we find befuddling. They knew a strike was looming, they knew how many episodes they made and they knew what would happen in the final episode. So…what was the intention again? Look, we know you’re trying to bait Ben Silverman into extending the series at the expense of your fans, and that is fine, just own up to it. As fans, most of us probably appreciate the effort. But your series is too good for us to think you’re a retard, so just own these shenanigans and we’ll call it a day.

Finally, The Wire gets some award recognition. Along with 30 Rock, the WGA anointed these two programs best writing in a comedy and drama. I guess this is appropriate, writers recognize great writing, and is just another indication that we need to start watching 30 Rock.

Speaking of The Wire, here’s an interview with Lance Reddick and how he almost came to play crack addicted Bubbles instead of the straight and narrow, well-intentioned yet ladder climbing police lieutenant. I wonder if there’s any mention of those Cadillac commercials. Enter into this with caution, he has a completely different voice than what he uses on the series, the only person it seems like you can’t say that about is the one character with the most uniquely baffling accent: Snoop.

That’s all we have for the time being, back tomorrow with — yyyyyaaaaawwwwn — probably more of the same.

Just a few links to continue this dreary two week stint (and counting) on this website. The only television we watched last night was Daily Show and Colbert Report, both of which furthered the ongoing feud between the comedy central hosts and the future tonight show host. We have to say, in lieu of the writers, continuing this running gag is probably the best alternative for both parties. All three personalities were featured on both variety shows, look for Colbert and Stewart to pop up on Conan’s show some time in the near future (They may have already gone on last night, we didn’t bother to find out though).

Here’s something with Jeff Probst walking through the new tribal council for the upcoming Survivor season. We didn’t watch it, because any type of Survivor hype strikes us as unsettling, unnecessary and flat out corny, in fact its probably the sole reason we didn’t bother to watch the series for its first eight or nine seasons. Essentially, we’re just posting this as an excuse to remind you that there is a new season starting Thursday, and it can only improve from last season.

Here’s an incredibly misinformed article from The Guardian relating celebrity to American politics. Clearly, and we don’t know how else to say this: this cat has obviously never been to a red state. Anyhow, relative to the article, if we’re picking our nation’s leaders based on their caliber of celebrity endorser, Obama (Clooney and Larry David) beats Clinton (Ted Danson and Barbara Streisand) in a fucking landslide.

Jason Bateman confirms Jeffrey Tambor’s confirmation of his previous declarations. Also, he adds what we already did about the decision lying solely on Mitchell Hurwitz’s shoulders. Jesus, you know, its not like the majority of the cast is struggling post AD. Cera has been in two featured films that have grossed tons of money and critical acclaim, Bateman is regularly in films with large releases, Portia De Rossi is trudging along on Nip Tuck, David Cross and Will Arnett are perennially in pedestrian comedies. All this success and they still want to reunite, that in and of itself is surprising and almost unprecedented.

The one-time president of the Bluth Company.

It’s looking grim for the future of Friday Night Lights. Not exactly news, but when the president of entertainment admits as much, then there is virtually no reason to be hopeful. Naturally, this announcement comes in the aftermath of what is unequivocally their best episode of the season. Whatever, I’m sure they can fill their time slot with yet another hour of Deal or No Deal.

Speaking of our favorite melodrama, here’s an article with writers from The Office, Mindy Kaling (Kelly) and Ryan Koh, writing the synopsis for the final episodes of the current FNL season and the climactic (also comedic) scene of the finale. There are four other features similar to this in the article, with television writers taking over for series’ completely different from their natural skill set, though this is the only one involving two series’ we watch.

Oh, and in case you were really anticipating the end of the writers strike, just settle down. Because even if it ended to day, we’d still have a month long hiatus before a new episode aired. Oh, and the WGA would also like to remind you that a deal has yet to be reached. So yeah, don’t look to drop your new healthy and productive lifestyle just yet.