Grid Effect

Damn, I was under the impression that we missed an episode of Nip Tuck last week while in New Orleans and we were therefore exempt from recapping the last episode we saw and the one we never did. But after some extensive research (going to IMDB and seeing the episode schedule, about as extensive as we ever get) it appears that we did no such thing, and thus are obligated to cover the most recent episode, which we haven’t seen in over a month.

Things we remember about the last Nip Tuck we saw: Matt, forming a bond with his horribly deformed grief counselor, Christian and Julia all but telling Sean that they are sleeping together again before he discovers as such, and the title character getting shot in the face by his estranged son while playing Santa Clause. Oh, also, Kimber’s shacking up with the porn king (we can’t recall his name, so that is how he’ll be referred to from now on) and refusing to let Matt see his kid.

It was all kind of predictable and tired, as is Nip Tuck’s wont. Matt, for about the hundredth time in the series has had a revelation to lead him down a different path. This time it seems to be a more noble one than running off with a porn star and embracing Scientology, or exploring his proclivity for transexuals before beating one senseless. But still, the kid is troubled and wants his son back, who I’m almost positive will turn out to be Christian’s or someone else’s down the road, just because everything on this show has to be emotionally devastating for someone. Should I still be complaining about this series when I know exactly what its going to offer, and that’s what most people want out of the show? Probably not, but when I start watching a television series I hope to see it evolve and change over time. This has not been the case here.

Tell me what you don’t like about our characterization and plot structure?

With Christian sleeping with Julia, it is official: they should have kept the series in Miami to save the production costs that may have came with the move. There isn’t anything different about in this setting compared to its original, sans a few comments about “making it” in LA in the first few episodes. Maybe one of the characters from “Hearts and Scalpels” will hold them hostage for some unbeknownst reason, it may be completely contrived but at least it would happen as a result of the switch to SoCal.

And when do any of these characters become redeemable. For what Julia is doing to her ex-husband and doing it without even a semblance of guilt, it almost makes you glad that Eden is poisoning her. Slowly. Seriously, what the fuck? I’m pretty sure Julia is going to croak from obesity and/or heart disease long before this “poisoning”. Who the fuck eats fruit cake in this capacity? Does she walk around with it? Has Eden never heard of sodium cyanide? She’s certainly attractive enough to attain some, why the hold up? Oh yeah, for dramatic effect. What’s a good poisoning subplot without Joely Richardson really feigning some scenes of lightheadedness?

And the twist at the end with the kid shooter being Collins’ son wasn’t predictable by any means, but rather pointless and melodramatic. Especially when the mother pulls out the gun. How vengeful. Clearly this man deserves to die for falling behind on child support. Sean’s reaction to this news was almost transcendent, “what, your behind on paying your wife a monthly court ordered sum of money? Get out of my office. How dare you procreate without the financial means to do so; so ordered by the state!”

Anyhow, it goes without saying our last Nip Tuck experience was an unpleasant one. And with all this unpleasantness mounting from this series, our recaps for these series will be whim based instead of mandatory. Because while we like to see something through to its conclusion, the recaps are intended to highlight series that are enjoyable, interesting and groundbreaking. At the moment, we don’t consider Nip Tuck to be any of these things.