Grid Effect

Alright, Wednesday. I couldn’t tell you the last time I watched a series on a Wednesday that wasn’t South Park, but it would be a tad incredulous if we just forwent the day in the middle of the week. Also, if you’re wondering what the title refers too, it’s the countdown until the NBA finals start and we have an excuse to skip the gym.

NBC

NBC is going green literally, and now figuratively.

They have basically the same schedule tonight that they had last night, except instead of Law & Order: SVU, it’s regular, bland Law & Order the original holding down the 10PM slot. Yep, no hate crimes here. Just a plain, old-fashioned, yawn-inducing and unprovoked murder of an entire family. Pssh, wake me up when your prime suspect has deviant sexual fantasies. But anyways, we’re not going to take the time to write out the same exact thing, but we will tell you that like we predicted, I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here! cleaned up on Monday. Which is all that really matters for NBC at this point.

ABC

8PM: Wipeout
Needs more humiliating tasks if it really wants to stack up to Japanese television.

9PM: The Goode Family
An hours worth of a sitcom in only its second week, that’s never a good sign. Better rush all those episodes to air before you no longer have any rationalization for doing so.

10PM: The Unusuals
Is this new? Has anyone heard of this before? Alright, it’s a cop show but with a pretend twist: Every cop has a secret. It looks a lot different from most cop shows out there. For instance, it’s set in New York. You don’t come across that everyday.

FOX

8PM: So You Think You Can Dance
Two hours. I think it’s time to reevaluate your life and priorities if you’re dedicating two hours of your life to this show, just like I did while typing out this sentence.

CBS

8PM: The New Adventures of Old Christine
Jesus, still. Really? Is there some sort of minimum age requirement to actually watch this series? Because it always seems blocked on my cable guide. I don’t think I’ve ever scrolled through the channels and seen this as available. I’m pretty sure you have to be a woman over the age of 55 to have access to The New Adventures of Old Christine.

8:30PM: Gary Unmarried
I will shamefully admit that I watched this once (and I didn’t see its lead-in adjacent to it), and the entire episode revolved around Gary having back problems. It was funny because when he fell down, he needed his ex-wife’s help to stand back up and went to the hospital. Hijinks!

9PM: Criminal Minds
It was, by some unholy overlord of our tiny, tiny world, renewed for next season. I’m pretty sure this is a rerun. In fact, I’m going to say its a rerun because if it’s the season finale, I want as few people watching it as possible. So yeah, go see a movie. I here that Up movie is the tops.

10PM: The Mentalist
God fucking damn it CBS. It never fails. Everyone else is mailing it in on an early summer Wednesday, yet they come through with four reruns of shows no one in their right fucking mind would bother too watch. But yeah, The Mentalist. I hope Simon Baker is happy about the path his career has taken. With that mug most people could live a rather effortless life, meanwhile he’s a failed movie star working on a third rate cop show that looks like every other third rate cop show. At least it gets good ratings, that’s better than working on Lie To Me, I suppose. At least Tim Roth has the built in excuse that he’s kind of normal looking.

That’s your schedule, we’re going to try and get to a couple of links post before the week is out, hopefully one of them is this afternoon.