Grid Effect

Probably no time for links today, as we forgot that South Park returned last night and need to review the episode later this afternoon. But we’ll have our last Wire review of the finale tomorrow, and a Wire-centric post of links. Onto the recap…

Pre-credits scene, Walking back from camp the fans are dejected, particularly the two kids who look almost identical. The following day, Chet and Tracy are already strategizing getting rid of Jason, who does seem like a bit of a pompous dickhead. No love lost here at Grid Effect.

The favorites are enjoying the offspring of their chicken and are looking forward to the parents. Ozzy agrees to chop its head off and does so almost gleefully, and PETA is sure to chime in at some point this week. Ozzy hid the immunity idol in a cave, he says in a camera interview that he’s going to withhold this information, then immediately tells James, then Parvati and Amanda. Amanda regals how they are the powerhouse, which can be entirely attributed to her, obviously.

At IC, we discover they are mixing tribes, Ozzy and Natalie are randomly selected captains.They break down as such:
Natalie takes James, James takes Alexis, Alexis takes Jonathan, Johnathan takes Jason, Jason takes Parvati, Parvati takes Kathy, she by default has to take Eliza
Ozzy takes Joel, Joel takes Amanda, Amanda takes Eric, he takes Ami, Ami takes Tracey, Tracey takes Cirie, she by default has to take Chet.

So your new teams are the following:
Malakal:
Ozzy
Joel
Amanda
Eric
Ami
Tracey
Cirie
Chet

Airai:
Natalie
James
Alexis
Jonathan
Jason
Parvati
Kathy
Eliza

They go right to the challenge with the new teams, and its like something out of a 80’s movie bar fight with the degree of injuries incurred. Two team members are harnessed together and have to pull the flag off of two opponents who are also harnessed together. They are borders which they can’t exceed and it’s in the woods, so the hazardousness is pretty damn high, especially if one teammate cannot keep up with the other.

I’m fairly certain that if I was dating his ex, I’d be walking around with a gun.

They’re playing for a feast of sorts and no one is going to exile. In the first round Erik and Ozzy are chasing Kathy and Natalie and run them down like wild dogs to grab the flag. Parvati and Eliza are chasing Chet and Joel and snag the flag in a little more dramatic fashion, Ami and Amanda are chasing James and Jason, Ami bangs her ankle but they capture the flag anyhow, to give you an idea how easy this is for the offensive side. Penner and Alexis take the next flag making it 2-2, but not before Penner’s leg is penetrated with some woodland object.

Chet and Joel are running down and Eliza and my lord is Chet a liability in these physical challenges! Chet smacks his head on a wooden plank and never recovers, or at least Joel never gives him the opportunity too. Eliza and Ami actually escape their would be captors (the first time it happened in this challenge), which makes sense since they would excel at communication having already spent a season together, and Chet and Joel summarily hate each other.

Malakal was the losing tribe, but the fans are ecstatic that they get to return to the favorites camp, which is rather lavish for a reality game show. Joel calls the loss poetic justice by his choice to get rid of Mike instead of Chet, and it’s kind of enjoyable to watch him totally befuddled and completely unwilling to take any blame for the loss. But he also sees the upside in having deadweight, and someone to vote off rather promptly. Ozzy levels with everyone, and he has to be glad to be at the same camp for the sake of the idol that I don’t think he’s allowed to recover if he’s shipped off to the other island. Ozzy calls Chet a sack of potatoes, and like everyone else, realizes he needs to go. Chet relates his place in the game to that of chickens natural pecking order, I guess he is lucky he didn’t see the beheading, then.

Over at Airai, the fans are a little disappointed with the surroundings and as if God is playing a joke on them, the water washes up too high and takes out the fire they are using to cook their newly acquired food. Jonathan is worried about the injury he sustained in that brutal challenge. Enough so that the medics show up and shoot him with some sort of numbing agent that looks remarkably painful, then stitch him up, which we “get” to see the entirety of. Apparently it could still be infected, so the stitching doesn’t make much sense, but I guess it’s the only short term solution if he wants to stay.

We cut to Ozzy beating the fish at their own game, meaning he is going about 12 feet below the surface of the water and spearing them at eye level. After this impressive display, Ozzy has Jason at his beck and call. Ozzy wants to get rid of Chet and Joel shows a little sense, wanting to get rid of Cirie beforehand, then wants to vote out Chet to even out the fans vs. favorites numbers. It’s pretty damn preemptive, but I like it. He’s covering all his bases and attempting to do what the googily eyed blond and PG tried in China, but in a less sinister way.

Jonathan is trying to get a new camp built and everyone is more than willing to pitch in. Surprisingly enough they don’t built it on wet sand. Brilliant. The fans really need to get over the favorites, a la Joel and Tracey. All this fanfare can’t be helping their cause.

Over at Malakal, Amanda has become the second survivor contestant to catch a shark, but she wrestled hers whereas Tom speared his. Ozzy finds it attractive, which has a tinge of bestiality to it somewhere, but I can’t figure out how. It’s like he wants to pull a Zeppelin on her or something.

At RC, the challenge consists of throwing rocks at ceramic targets then solving a puzzle. Ozzy murders the first, James continues to disappoint and whiffs, but partially breaks the second one. Malakal only has one to break, James partially breaks another one and Jason finishes it off. Jonathan gets into an exchange with Probst after he blatantly misinterprets jonathan’s bitching. It’s worth pointing out that Jonathan is hobbling around like Forrest Gump in leg braces, so this challenge couldn’t be more timely. While solving the puzzle, Chet is completely useless giving directions perched atop the layout on a lifeguard chair of sorts. Eliza proves those comprehension skills she needed for her LSAT by blatantly outclassing him. At this point production almost has to send him home to end this national humiliation.

Coming back from the challenge, Malakal is looking dispirited as they should. but it’s a pretty quick fix, just rid yourself of the saboteur and all will be right with the world. Joel and Jason are agreeing they want to get rid of Chet. Joel’s claiming he’s never been around someone with so little backbone, and says if they went back to medieval times they would finish him permanently. It’s funny, we make jokes about them being medieval, and then they make literal references to it. Cirie, feeling next in line on the chopping block if the motto is indeed weakest is first to go, makes a move to get rid of Joel first. she seems to be actually be persuading Ozzy after approaching Chet and Tracy about the prospect. We go to Tribal with Ozzy and Amanda being swing votes of sorts.

At TC, we discuss the selection process. Ozzy says he took Joel with the intent of just countering Natalie’s pick of James. Tracy defends Chet in the reward challenge, she claims communication and that seems thin but arguable, as Joel is something of a blockhead, though we couldn’t really hear what (if anything) was being exchanged. Everyone gives non-committal answers that explains in one way or another who they are voting for. Jason votes for Chet, Chet votes for Joel, Tracy votes for Joel for calling her “weak one too many times”, the rest read as such:
Joel
Chet
Chet
Joel
Joel
Joel
Joel
Well, I guess should they lose another challenge, at least they still have a scapegoat. Really, I can’t believe Ozzy agreed to that nonsense, don’t get me wrong, Joel’s a schmuck-face, but he just said at tribal that he picked Joel to counter James’ strength, and now that is gone. It’s no wonder the tribe with Chet and Tracy on it continues to lose challenges. At least it keeps things interesting. And somehow Cirie again has executive control over the game. Again. We still have Ozzy and Amanda who might come to their senses.

Tonight: Eric apparently believes he found the the immunity idol, apparently not realizing its nothing more than shaved wood. And Jonathan has an infection that could potentially be fatal, so it sounds like we won’t have a tribal council.

in his parting words, Joel is humiliated and feels insulted. He’s actually a touch bitter. One thing you never learned, Joel, is to be a leader, people have to find you somewhat likable. As a result of his outing, he wants to “ring a few necks”. How else did you expect him to leave the game but to physically threaten someone?

South Park review later.