Grid Effect

These posts keep making it out later and later in the morning and for that you have my apologies. But what I can’t apologize for is the absolute dearth of series’ to write about. So far this week we’ve posted four times, and only once was for something we actually recommended (The Extras finale). So, while our posts might be late, we’re pinning it on a lack of motivation…and mundane paper pushing. Seriously, the posts we write pales in comparison to the paper we move.

Holy fucking Christ yes, this is what we’ve been waiting for: the “official” trailer for the fifth season of The Wire. I guess the other five or so we’re just prep trailers for this one. Some people like to remain completely unspoiled, so if you don’t want to hear anything about the final season, stop reading HERE………Of the four kids, we know at least Michael will be back in full form next season, if I were to speculate, I’d also say we see Dukie, no Namond and possibly Randy, depending on whether or not Carver followed through on his promise to adopt him. Also, Avon’s back, but it looks like he’s still in prison. And if that’s the case, Weebay would be around as well. If this doesn’t make you wish for the new year, nothing will. As a side note, we’ll be in New Orleans for the premiere, and we’ll be running around frantically looking for a television with HBO. Sad, maybe. But at least it’s honest.

Denise, the mulleted lunch lady on Survivor: China lied about her demotion and pay cut at the reunion, and it turned out her transition to janitorial work was actually a promotion. So any field hockey game she missed were of her own volition. To her credit she return the check to Mark Burnett. Damn, if she had said she excepted a promotion that had a marginally improved salary but with shittier hours, she probably still would have been offered that check. Instead she accepted it under false pretenses, and the multi-millionaire gets to keep his 50 g’s.

“Wait, you mean she was lying?…Well does she still want the money?…I’m not going to a fucking bank, give it to a homeless man or something. Peons.”

Letterman, is returning with his writers on January 2nd. Apparently they’re hoping for a “special exemption” through some loophole the show’s producers may have found, but either way they’re willing to improve the writers salaries as much as the show itself is allowed to do. Letterman must be scared shitless about returning without them.

David Chase has contemplated tears over this lawsuit filed against him. I guess he weighed the positives and negatives and decided against it. David Chase, that’s an emotional guy. We haven’t commented on it yet because it sounds so frivolous, but apparently a New Jersey judge is claiming co-creation of the series because he introduced Chase to some men with mafia ties that served as inspiration for much of the series. While he’s entitled to something, and I wouldn’t be surprised if Chase snubbed him, half of everything the showrunner generated is an absurd request. That’s civil suits for you, though. Ask high, receive a greater sum than you would have if you had asked for a reasonable offer. It’s fucking idiotic. If anything you should be publicly humiliated in some fashion for being so egregious.

We couldn’t fathom such a privileged life when staying in from a booze-filled, elongated awards show is considered a “sacrifice”, but that is exactly the boat most of the actors are in with the Golden Globes. Yes, several of them are going to be so generous to the writers as to not attend an awards show in their name. Guilt has to be the motivating factor in all those charitable donations and philanthropy from celebrities.

Todd from Survivor is humble enough to admit that he isn’t a replica of whose generally considered one of the greatest strategists in the game’s history. I know most of you were thinking he’s exactly like Richard Hatch just like most of you refer to me as the reincarnation of Thoreau, but he’s willing to admit that this is not the case. Also, his last name is Herzog…doesn’t he almost have to be a distant relative of Werner Herzog? How many of them are floating around in the US anyways? Also, that’s a German name. So, that makes Todd a gay Mormon flight attendant with German ancestry living in Utah…be glad you were born in the 80’s Todd.

And finally, its been ten years since Chris Farley tragically passed away. There still has been no one even remotely similar to him and he’s stood the test of time, making him the 90’s Jim Belushi. Go back and watch an old skit as the motivational speaker, the impressionable talk show host, Chips audition or Schmitt’s gay, and all of them are still hysterical and better than anything SNL has put out since McDonald-Ferrell-Breuer all left the show. If there is a heaven, I’d like to think Hartman and Farley are currently doing improv in it.

Back tomorrow with a multiple post day.